Our Love {Nina Dobrev And Ian Somerhalder Fanfiction}

Chapter 37 - Words

Nina's POV

My heart raced in my chest fast that all I could hear was the loud sound of it.

I sighed as I closed my eyes, breathing in and out, taking as much air as I could.

This is it..

I straightened my black dress and fixed my hair one more time.

I have to face him, I have to pretend to be with him just for his parents. I wish I never agreed to do this but I have to.

I haven't seen or spoken to him ever since the incidence that happen a week ago, when the idiot stabbed himself.

I love him, and yesterday I realised myself that no matter what I told myself, or lied to myself and no matter how many guys I will go out with, some part of heart will always love Ian.

But there's no way in hell I'll show him that.

I got out of the room, closing the door lightly. Zach met me at the end of the room, he approuched me, carrying his daughter with one arm and holding out the other for a hug.

"Hey." He grinned.

"Hey." I repeated, kissing his and his daughter's cheek.

"The babysitter is coming in a few minutes or so, she one's her way." He paused looking at his watch before letting out a small laugh, "actually, she's 20 minutes late."

I smiled, too nervous to even let a laugh out.

"How are you feeling?" He asked, his voice filled with concern as he frowned.

"I'm okay- I'm okay."

He raised an eyebrow, eyeing me suspiciously, "Neen."

"Okay fine I'm not that okay but I'm sort of okay- I ugh-"

"Nina, I know how you're feeling. You don't want to see him, you don't want to face, you're afraid to do that. And I don't know why you are, but it'll be alright. I'm sure of it." He said, smiling.

Looking at his charming, handsome smile made me smile myself, "okay. Thank you!" I hugged him again.

"Anytime."

Just then the doorbell rang, signalling the babysitter was finally here.

"About time.." Zach murmured under his breath before placing a big smile on his face, opening the door to the babysitter who opened her arms wide open to hold the cutie.

I waved a hello at the babysitter and stood at the same exact space. I could see their mouths move but I couldn't hear a single word they were saying.

I'm going to see him..
I have to pretened that I'm with him.
I'll have to hold him and tell him that alright, just in front of the people.
I'll probably watch him cry.

And then I would most certainly forgive him.

So if anything, I'm more nervous and scared because of myself more than anyone or anything.

I shuddered at that thought.

"Come on! Let's go we can't be late." Zach offered me a smile and I nodded following behind him.

He waved one last time and with that we headed towards the hallways and down to the elevator.

I knew the closer we got, the more and faster my heart started beating, the heavier and less my breaths became and the weaker my legs felt.

It's been a week since I last talked to him, since I last seen him laying in that hospital bed. I couldn't help but wonder, how is he doing now?

After leaving New York and going back to California, I tried to focus more on myself than anything, I auditioned for a mini role in a movie too! I did everything I felt like doing even seeing some of my friends and co-workers from a long time.

But now I'm here.. The state where I lost him, where he stabbed himself, the state where we felt happy but also had sad moments, where we made love not more than a month ago, weeks even, and also, the state where I left him.

I can do it! You can do it Nina. I kept saying those things in my head, trying to encourage myself and before I even knew it we were outside the church.

Oh god, these are going to be the most dreadful and tiring hours. Ever.

And just when I thought and believed that I could do it. I saw his face. He still managed to look wonderful, even in his sister's funeral.

We shared an eye contact for a split minute, he nodded at me and bit his lip. Ugh

Okay Nina, you can't do it..

"I'll be right back!" I mumbled to Zach and headed to the opposite direction.

I walked over to him and he wrapped his arms around me, embracing me tightly before whispering in my ears, "My mom is watching."

I nodded, breaking the hug, his arms around me reminded me of all the good memories I had with him. I bit the inside of my cheeks, not saying a word. Because I had thousands words to say, but not any of those words came out of my mouth. Except a few words that shocked Ian. And myself even more.

"I love you." I blurted out covering my mouth right after, Ian's blue eyes widened and so did mine.

((I'm sorry this was a bad written and a very short chapter. I'm currently travelling around the world, having 6 surgeries just in one month! I finished my first one two days ago, and I thougjt I needed to update. I'm very sorry, I promise I'll update a longer, better chapter as I get better. Thank you for reading))