REALLY WATTPAD? REALLY?

Chapter 38: no, just, NO

This chapter is about the things that really just, no.

  1.       Our lips crashed together

 

Expectation: I grabbed his collar and crashed our lips together but it was passionate

One does not simply smash lips with someone else and think it felt "soft and passionate" *judging you*

Ok yep! If you guys are planning on crashing your lips some more, I suggest you go find some lip insurance. K?

  2.       That's not a creative description, that's nonsense!

Those people who will literally use just any words to describe stuff, and they think that they are being creative. Like I literally saw this:

I brushed the ledge of his shoulder.

We had been walking for hours and my arms and ledges hurt.

 

Uummmm what? Last time I checked, people don't have "ledges" humans are not the same thing as cliffs and the Grand Canyon.

Another description that didn't make sense, and by the way, not only was this not making any sense, but it had bad spelling:

So I flew open my round orbz called eyeballz, and I got outta my throne-like loft as I made my way to da lavatory.

 

Squinting as the light from are deerist solar system's sun poured it's rays warmth on my. Beautiful.. clear, exotic........

 

ALIEN FACE! LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL

 

Yeah, alien face? Seriously? You may think you are being descriptive and creative but you aren't. You sound like the winner of a stupid competition.

  3.       Whoa! Slow down man what the fook?

 

a.       The storyline is rushed

When the main boy and main girl literally meet like, in the first chapter and are already fookin' in the second chapter. No!

b.      Starbucks

 

No ok?

You are not going to be walking around with your chocolate chip frap, bump into Harry Styles, and marry him the next day. Nope!

c.       Really?

When the main girl is all like "I don't wanna give my virginity to the wrong person" but then the main boy enters and her excuse is.

"My hormones got the better of me and we fooked lol lol lol lol lol"

Are you stupid or something? Are you seriously "lolling" about that?

  4.       Don't friggin use text language! And check your spelling!

I'm so sick of seeing this:

S0 I w4s totally textin my BFF, on wat were we gonna do today and we desided togo to da mall.

 

"omg lmfaoooo" I wuz saying to my BFF

 

Cuz she totes told me sunthin funy!!111!!!!!1!!111!!!!

 

No ^^^ please no. unless you want me to get some magic flying potatoes and virtually throw them at you, I suggest you don't do that. Or this.

M/c: hey Harry how r u doing?

 

Harry: im doing good how bout u?

 

Mc: awesome I luf uuuuuu

 

Unless they are actually texting DON'T WRITE LIKE THAT!

  6.       If you are afraid to use cuss words, then either don't put them or substitute them, please do not f*cking put a star.

The title says it all, please do not blank out cusswords, either don't use them, use them, or create substitute words.