Capture My Soul: A Lucifer Fanfiction

Chapter Twenty: Revelations

My world seemed to still, time losing meaning as I stared at the scars beneath my hands. How was this possible? How was this real? Although my mind spun, my thoughts in a whirlwind out of control, oddly enough I wasnt afraid. It wasnt so much that he was the devil that terrified me, no, it was the fact that all of it was real. Heaven, hell, angels, demons. The supernatural existed and I was currently showering with it.

"Lorelai?" His voice, filled with a sort of agony I couldnt identify, snapped me out of my wayward thoughts. I jerked my hands back, the electric heat fading away as I stared wide eyed at Lucifer. His face mirrored my own and we stood there, the water spraying on us as we lost ourselves to our minds. "I-Im, I dont, Im sorry," I whispered. I was having trouble forming coherent thoughts, my brain refusing to move back into a regular thinking pattern. He seemed to forget his troubles, his brows coming together. "Love, whats wrong?"

I looked up at him, staring up at the man that I cared for deeply, the man that had been so affectionate towards me, who had taken my virginity just last night. The man I was falling in love with. My gaze bored into his, the devil himself. "You really are the devil, arent you?" I whispered.

His eyes widened and he took a step back as if I had slapped him. A cold welled up in me and I felt my knees begin to shake. I crumpled to the floor of the shower, my mind shutting down. This was too heavy, too much for my body and mind to handle. I wrapped my arms around myself, the hot water doing nothing to soothe the cold within. "Lorelai? Lorelai!?" Lucifer's panicked voice echoed in the shower, and I felt him kneel down next to me. I stared at the tile, my eyes glazing over. "Talk to me, please. Say something," but I couldnt move, couldnt speak.

"Lorelai, please," his voice cracked, pain lacing his tone and that was my undoing. My eyes jerked up to his, and my heart broke. I threw myself at him, my arms winding around his neck as I crawled onto his lap. I buried my face in the crook of his neck, shaking. "Its all real," I murmured, squeezing my eyes shut. "Its all real," hesitantly, his arms wrapped around me, rocking me back and forth. "Shh," he whispered, "its alright, love. Its alright," but how could it be? How could everything be alright when my entire world was just tipped off of its axis.

Im not entirely sure how long we sat there, how long he held me, whispering soothing words in my ear. Eventually though, he rose, holding me in his arms as he carried me out. Somehow, he carried me back to his bedroom, wrapping me in a towel before lying me down on the bed. I watched him start to walk away and a panic rose up in me, "no!" I cried, causing him to turn around and look back to me. "Please dont leave me," I begged. He nodded, lying down next to me on the bed and draping an arm over my waist. Lucifer pulled me to him, his eyes boring into mine.

He reached up, moving wet strands of hair off my face before lightly caressing my cheek. "Please," he begged, "tell me what youre thinking."

"How is this real? How is this possible?" I whispered. "I cant, I dont understand, its so much and its so-"

"Terrifying?" he finished for me. I frowned, shaking my head. "Confusing." This seemed to spark some emotion within him, one that my broken mind wouldnt process at the moment. Lucifer was the devil and yet somehow, I wasnt afraid of him. I knew the man he was, I knew how he felt about me. Nothing could change that, but to learn that hell existed, that demons and who knows what else, was scary. Not because I was terrified of them, but because I didnt understand how it coud exist.

"Its all so much," I whispered, going on even though he had never asked for it. "How can I suddenly just accept that all these things exist? How am I supposed to go on living knowing that there is a hell and I might be sent there?"

"No!' Lucifer growled, "youre not going there. Ever. You are too good for it." But was I? Who was to say I was? Lucifer? Why? Did sleeping with the devil automatically get you a get-out-of-hell-free card? I thought it would be the opposite to be honest. "Its just a lot to absorb," I mumbled, sinking into him again. His body warmed mine, comforted me, and I felt him relax. "I know, love. Im sorry." He held me for a long while; my body felt fatigued, as if it had been through some massive physical feat. I wanted to just close my eyes, welcoming the darkness that would pull me into hours of blissful sleep, but my mind was too wired for that. Instead, I let Lucifer hold me, his hands caressing my body over the towel he had wrapped around me. There was nothing sexual about this, our embrace, only comfort and affection.