His Weakness, Her Liberation

Back to Reality

I returned to Atlanta a little changed from my experience with Michael. Despite him using my number that night in Miami, months went by with no word from him. I tried to forget about that weekend to keep myself from regretting something I did or didn't do. I tried to forget to keep myself sane. One night I was scrolling through Instagram and saw Michael was spotted at an Atlanta bar. The post said he was in town for a while shooting a new film. The one we decided he would take that night in Miami. I was pissed that he was in my city and hadn't reached out to me, but I was more hurt than anything. He didn't owe me anything I told myself, but that didn't help the way I felt. So, I decided I would be a crazy bitch that night and pop up at the spot he was at. Despite what most people think who aren't from here, Atlanta is a small city, so it wouldn't be strange to "run into" Michael, or any celebrity for that matter. I recognized the bar he was spotted in and quickly put some make up on, a cute top and jeans and flew out the door.

I hit the bar up as soon as I got to the spot to calm my nerves. My best friend was out of town, so I was flying solo and needed all the help I could get. My plan was to play it cool, get in Michael's eyesight and act like I didn't notice him because I was having the time of my life. My plans went to hell as I searched for him for nearly an hour, with no luck. So I decided to get plastered. Like shit-faced. There was a karaoke section in the back of the  bar and I love karaoke because I can sing and was always a favorite every time I blessed the mic. I began to sing along to "I Want to Thank You" by Alicia Myers, a song in which she literally thanks God for sending her a man that loves and cherishes her. I was hopeful that would be a song I could sing from experience one day. Midway through the second verse I noticed a man watching me. Of course there were people watching me,  but I could see this man singing every word with me. The lights were bright on stage, so I couldnt make out who it was and my attention pivoted elsewhere.

After stumbling off stage feeling low, I stopped at the bar for one last drink before calling an Uber. As I sat at the bar feeling sorry for myself; I thought about how pathetic I was to do what I did tonight. I pitied the woman who decided to essentially stalk a man she'd only spent a few moments with, who didn't think enough of her to call her in months, not even when he was in her city. I felt a tear longing to escape from my eyes and a tightness in my throat I was familiar with. My body once again, at the thought of Michael was willing to betray me. I fought off the tears until I got into my uber and cried all the way home.