That October Night

Chapter 25

                      DEACTIVATING MY SOCIAL MEDIA accounts meant pretending that three months ago didn't happen. Even when my memories kept reminding me of it, secluding myself from the online world was like having no proof it ever really existed.

And here my brother was mimicking my footsteps. But instead of the internet, he eliminated himself from parties like canceling unknowns in the system of equations.

As if that was the answer to solving the problem, the problem that already happened.

But this was no mathematical problem. This was life.

This is life.

So I kicked him off my bed, satisfied at the loud thud and his painful groaning. I tilted over the bed, watching him hold his head.

"Why are you in my room when you should be at that party? According to Carlos, it's an all senior party. You're not gonna be a senior forever, asshole."

"And in two hours, thirty-four minutes and ten milliseconds; it'll be your birthday." I heard the voice before I saw him, but when a shirtless Carlos entered my room; I was stupefied.

"I'm jaw-dropping, huh. I know."

"What?" I wiggled my head, focusing on what he said. "Ewww. Your tattoos are legit but no. It's the first time I saw you without your SnapBack on excluding when you're on the court."

With a frown, Carlos took one of my MnM's and walked out of the room with his lips sealed. Chris' phone lit up seconds after, showing a message from Carlos. I laughed reading the message out loud.

Carlos: I'm going home to get ready. Meet you at the party.

"I'm not going," Chris told me, sitting up, his back against the bed.

"Since when did you miss out on a party?" The answer was obvious, but I prayed he didn't say it out loud. Saying it out loud meant that all the pretending in the world couldn't erase three months ago.

"The last time I went out...when I came home you were...."

Chris' usual bright blue eyes dimmed until I couldn't see myself in them anymore. His clenched white fists were clenched so tight, caricaturing my heart.

So I crawled on the ground beside him.

"Do you think you can protect me forever? You'll be in college in a few months. Maybe even in a different state." I held his balled hands in mine, peeling his fingers open one at a time.

Everything about this was emotionally onerous. I felt as though my problems were breaking my family apart, from each other and from themselves.

"Brother, please be young. It's your senior year. Go." I stopped pleading.

The last time I told someone to go, he was gone for good. And I still haven't heard a word from him except a 'Don't worry. We're good.' message from this morning.

This morning!

"Go but please come back."

"But-"

"Chris, get out of my room now."

But he stayed planted on his ass until Dad walked in.

"Christian, don't you have a party to go to?" When Chris choose to stay silent dad sat on the ground with us. "Disappear bodyguard in training, the big boss is here now."

"Just so you know, I'm going because I want to, not because you two teamed up against me," Chris grumbled, getting up. But we all knew he only left because dad was really there and I wouldn't be home unprotected.