My phone was on speaker with Laura and Zendaya while I laid in my empty bed. I need to console with my close friends because I am extremely nervous. The press and media never scare me, but at this moment, I feel utterly terrified.
"I'm just saying, what if they ask about him and I just freeze up or something?"
Today is the day of my premiere for Anastasia which means that I am going to be seeing Ansel and my other co-workers today for the movie. I feel excited to see them, especially Ansel since I haven't seen him and his girlfriend for a while.
Though my break up with Tom was almost five months ago, it doesn't mean that I am completely over him. He comes across my mind quite often because he above all is the reason as to why I ended up being in this movie. Without his encouragement, I would not be attending tonight's premiere.
He doesn't know, but I really do appreciate him for helping me achieve this role and I wish I could thank him. He helped me accept that in order for my career to move forward, I have to take huge risks.
"You won't. Just remember to answer professionally and only give your professional opinion. Besides, it's not like he's going to be there," said Zendaya.
I sighed, "But he should be..." I mumbled, hoping that neither of them heard what I said.
"Didn't hear you. What did you say?" Laura asked.
"Nothing. Don't worry about it. I guess I should go now. I'll see you guys soon. I miss you guys and I wish you were with me."
"We know, and we wish we were able to make it. Good luck at your premier, you're going to kill it!" Laura encouraged.
I smiled. "I love you guys. Thank you."
"We love you. Now go crush it," Zendaya added.
We said our goodbyes and then hung up.
I also gained the courage to share a photo on Instagram. After a few months' break, I felt ready to reconnect with the media. It was time... the last post that I made was informing everyone about Tom and I's break up. I didn't intend my break on social media to be so long, but it was. I got carried away with filming and I never really felt that I was ready to share my life with the world once more.
I have no regrets for taking that break from the media because it wasn't just about getting over Tom. I had never done so much deep thinking alone and taking time to really focus on myself and without the pressure of the media and feeling the need to post allowed me to do what had to be done.
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Tagged: anastasiathemovie
Zara Costanza ✅: HEY! I finally feel ready to gradually return to the media. No, I did not just leave the media because Tom and I broke up. I also took a break because it was very much needed. After Spider-Man and Anastasia, I really just needed some time to myself and to reconnect with me and I needed to focus on myself... and YES, I will be in the second Spider-Man movie. Just because one thing happened, doesn't give me a reason to quit because then I'd be letting the whole fandom down. I'm sorry to leave you guys in the dark, but you'll see... well, I'm back and I don't plan on leaving anytime soon.
