Status: In the Midst

Not in Love.

July 2018

Zara Costanza

July. July used to be the month that I dreamed of and couldn't wait for. But that was the original plan... it was when I was with Tom.

Now that it's not like that, I dreaded this month.

Yes, I am excited to be reunited with some old cast mates, specifically Zendaya, Tony, Jacob, and I'll even get to see Harrison again, but that also means that I am also going to be seeing Tom.

According to the script, my character, Zoey Fields, and Peter Parker have a lot of scenes together. Our characters are forming an on-screen romance, and at one point, our characters are supposed to kiss.

As for the kissing scene, I'm already expecting it to be weird and though it's going to be a few weeks before we film it, I already feel anxious. I am expecting it to be awkward and weird, but that scene is not going to be filmed for a few weeks, so I didn't want to worry about it too much.

What also makes July even worse is that Laura won't be joining us on-set for the movie because her character Liz, has no role in Spider-Man: Far From Home. However, for the first day or so, she said that she would stop by and say hello.

I got a ride from my apartment to the filming studio in Atlanta. The drive was short because I decided to lease an apartment near the studio while filming Far From Home.

As I stepped outside of the car and as it drove away, I just stood in front of the studio for a few moments taking it all in. So many memories were made in this studio and it was where I met so many of my friends. Not to mention, it was where I met my first love.

I sighed and reached for the door, but there was something inside of me that prevented me from pulling the handle.

What if I'm not ready?

I told myself countless times that I am ready. Ready for the movie, ready to reunite with everyone again.

But this voice inside my head continuously denied that. Even though I prepared my lines and felt excited to meet with my old friends.

I pulled my hand back and continued to just stare at the studio.

As I was in mid-thought, a set of hands clasped my shoulders abruptly causing me to jump and scream.

"Oh my gosh!" I shrieked, turning around to see that it was the one and only Harrison Osterfield. "Oh, my gosh, Harrison!" I said happily and embraced him with a hug.

"Harrison-" I hit his shoulder after each word I said. "You-bloody-absolute-arse! When will you stop with the scares!"

He began to laugh, "Never. Come on, Zar, I know you've missed me," he opened his arms and embraced me with a second hug.

I smiled and accepted his hug. To be fair, I did miss him the moron, a lot. After Tom and I broke up, I became more distant from Harrison, Jacob, and Tony as they were really good friends with Tom. I was good friends with Zendaya and Laura, so when we broke up, the seven of us sort of stopped hanging out together as a group. However, Tom had the boys and I had the girls, so it worked out.

In the midst of hugging him, I had a realization, causing an internal panic attack to occur. If Harrison is here, then that means that Tom's nearby as well... frantically, I scanned the area behind Harrison.

"Relax. He's not here yet," said Harrison. I'm very impressed. He read my mind instantly.

I scoffed at his comment. "Pfft, what-what do you mean? No clue what you're-"