desires / fillie

wait

finns pov

i'm sitting in the back of the ambulance, staring down at millie while i let out sobs and say "i'm sorry" over and over again.

we get to the hospital, and the paramedics rush her into the e.r.

they take her into a trauma room, and they tell me that i can't enter.
i fall to the floor and dig my face into my arms.

i'm such a bad boyfriend.

she'll never forgive me.

-

noah rushes into the hospital, tears flowing from his eyes.
we lock eyes, and he rushes over to me.

"you have some nerve to come here." i say.
"what are you talking about?" he asks, clearly confused.
"if you're talking about the rumors, they aren't true, i swear. i would never do that. i'm gay." he confesses, and my eyes widen.
"really?" i ask, furrowing my eyebrows.
"yeah. only my group of friends know, i haven't told millie yet." he says.

i cant tell if he's lying or not.

"who would start these rumors?" i ask.
"my best guess is iris. yesterday, she pushed millie to the ground. i went over and helped her, and walked her to her class. maybe she saw, and twisted the story to mess with us. with you."

it makes so much more sense.

he sits beside me, and we wait for a doctor to tell us when we can see her.

-

noah gets up to go to the bathroom and i continue to wait.

a tall doctor with light gray hair walks over to me, and his name tag read "dr. brenner."

"hello, i'm dr. brenner. you're a friend of ms. brown, i assume?" he asks.

i nod.

"well shes doing okay, it'll definitely take her a while to recover. not long, maybe a few weeks to a month at most. she lost a lot of blood, so we want to focus on that first. you can follow me."

i follow him into a hospital room, where millie lays unconscious with a tube down her throat.

tears start to well up in my eyes.

"she's still unconscious due to the amount of blood she lost, but she should wake up within the next day or so." he notices that i'm crying, and he pats my back. "she'll be okay, kid." and he walks out.

i grab a chair and move it over to the bed.
i sit down, not taking an eye off of her.

"why did i let this happen to you?" i ask.
"i-i love you so much. you know that?" i trace her cheek with my thumb, beginning to cry even more.
"i will never let anything bad happen to you ever again. you won't have to worry. i'll take good care of you, okay? i-i'll make sure you're happier from now on. i'll do anything for you. you name it." i take her hand that lays closest to me. i rest my head on her stomach, and i close my eyes.

-

i wake up and look around the hospital room. it's dark outside now, because it's 10pm. i see noah passed out on the couch by the door.
i turn to millie, and she's still unconscious.

i get up and grab my lighter and a cigarette, and walk out of the hospital. i light my cigarette and take a long puff.

please let millie forgive me.

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this chapter was short, i hope it's okay.