KILLER QUEEN ↠ The 100 Preferences

Goodbye (Clarke)

your heart pounded as you watched clarke and bellamy getting ready to leave for becca's lab. you knew how long it would take. ten damn hours. you gulped just at the thought. there was less than a day until praimfaya and yet here was your girlfriend, dressing up to go out and risk her life right before the end of the god damn world. it didn't surprise you though. this was clarke, after all. which is why when she told you that you couldn't come, you were angry.

"Y/N, i think anyone could see your glare from miles away." clarke giggled as she did up her glove that was covering her right hand. when you didn't respond nor laugh–like you usually would have–she glanced up. her lips in a straight, tight line. her brow furrowed with concern, she stepped towards you. she reached for your hand but you pulled away before she could.

"Y/N please don't do this to me before I go out there." She begged, her lips parting slightly as she started to grow impatient.

"let me come with you." your voice was barley audible, so small you sounded like a small mouse against the room. clarke shook her head, almost as if she was frustrated with you.

"no." clarke shrugged. she didn't even try to sugarcoat it. she was so protective of you from the start. ever since you guys landed and you tripped because you were pretty clumsy. you eventually got stronger and became this warrior that you didn't even think you could become, but clarke still would never let you leave her sight.

"clarke-"

"no Y/N. look," she let out a long sigh and placed her hands gently against your soft cheeks, her blue irises landing on you, "I can't lose you, not after everything. you're my everything. my world. baby, if i lost you, i don't know what i would do."

you watched a few tears slide down her face quickly, falling against the bright red suit that covered her from her neck to her feet. you resisted the urge to reach up and swipe them away with your thumb, but fighting it off was one of the most difficult things in the world, you always hated seeing her like that.

your mind screamed at you to not give in, not give her this satisfaction but dammit those large blue storms in her eyes called to you and suddenly your heart was throbbing all over again.

you wrapped your arms around her neck, your face burying into her shoulder to hide your tears that started to come. she replied by wrapping her suit-covered arms around your waist and holding you as close as possible. you breathed in the smell that was clarke griffin and every nerve in your body relaxed for the moment. you pulled back, eyes scanning clarke's saddened face.

you knew bellamy was almost finished getting ready on your right. your eyes landed on him and after clearing your throat his short brown curls whipped toward you two. "keep her safe, okay?"

bellamy nodded quickly, sending you a quick smile, hoping it might help. he has always been a good friend to you, you were thankful for that. "however long you guys are out there."

your voice cracked as those awful words came pouring out. it had been bouncing around your head, the thought of them not making it back.

"hey, this isn't goodbye." the space between clarke's eyebrows creased in that reassuring way it always had. the pit in your stomach was still telling you it was goodbye, but you listened to your girlfriend, it was the only hope you had left.

"just-i love you, okay?" you reminded her, as if you haven't said those words a thousand times. she smiled and pressed a kiss to your lips. it was deep and loving, her hands clasped around your jacket told you she was nervous about this too, so you just grabbed ahold of her and hugged her until abby walked in. they had to go.

"i'll be back, i promise." clarke had said right before both her and bellamy exited the bunker. you didn't realize at that moment that those would be the last words from your girlfriend that you would hear for six years.

[A/N] is this a terrible comeback ?? probably anyways i'm actually trying to come back to writing, i miss it