The Broken Ones

Stitch Fixed

Song: Ready To Change by Kodaline

The next day came sooner than I wanted it to. I had texted John once I woke up that he would have to meet me at a nearby coffee shop to discuss why I haven't been talking to him. He quickly agreed and so here I was, getting ready to head out to meet with John. I am extremely nervous, I am really debating on whether to cancel it. I just know that this will bug me the whole day if I don't go and that Jessica won't like it that I did cancel. So here I am, preparing myself to head out to talk to John. Jessica had walked into my room, leaning against the door frame. "Whatcha doin'?" I look at her through the mirror. "I am going to meet up with John but I am nervous." She stares at me through the mirror and then crosses her arms. "You shouldn't be. It's John and I am sure that he will understand what you're going to. And it's not his fault that you want to break up with him. He knew that you were going through a rough time, so he shouldn't blame you." I nodded I mean, I guess she is right. He really can't be mad since I have been going through with Alexander and it isn't his fault that I have to break up with him. I like him a lot and I would like to date him, just not with everything going on. 

Jessica then left my room and I just stared at myself and then sighed. Well, I better go now before I do actually end up canceling. And so I headed out of the house and started walking towards the cafe. It was a hot day today, so I did end up sweating a lot a bit. I hope I don't end up looking like trash when I end up at the cafe. I did end up getting a text from John that said that he was already there and ordered for me. It did make me feel bad that he did all of that when I am just going to end up hurting his feelings in the end. I hope that he doesn't feel that bad in the end. As I did walk though, the streets were busy and there were quite a lot of people out. I guess it being a Friday, that it is going to be very busy out. But after about another ten minutes, I arrived at the cafe. I could see through the window of the cafe, John sitting far in the cafe, sipping a cup of coffee and his phone on the other hand. I could feel my nerves going crazy and my hands shaking a bit. I sucked in my breath though and I slowly let it out. I forced my heavy legs into the cafe and the scent of coffee and something bitter flowed into my nose. I then walked towards John, clearing out my throat to make my presence known. He looked up and smiled. "Hey. You finally came. I didn't think you would." My cheeks flamed up a bit, but then I sat down across from him. "Yeah, sorry I took so long. Walking in the hot is a struggle." He nodded but didn't say anything about it. 

I looked at him and just felt the urge to just get up and run away. "I'm sorry that I haven't been responding to you. I have just been going through a lot." He smiled, "No, it's totally fine. I understand. Don't worry about it. Also, here is your coffee. Sorry if its cold." I nodded, taking the now cold coffee in my hand then took a deep breath. "I need to talk to you though about something serious." That is when he straightened out, setting his phone down on the table and looking at me with concern. "What's wrong?" I really did hate I have to do this. "You know that I have had some issues with my ex-husband and that I haven't had the easiest with handling with him being back." He bobbed his head, listening to what I was saying. My voice was drowning a bit in the sounds in the cafe but I could see that he could hear me. "Well, I just don't want to hurt you in the process while dealing with all of what I am going through." That is when there was this look on his face. He sat there, just looking at me, waiting for me to give up the punch. "I don't think I can do this while leading you onto something that just won't probably work out." He then sat back and looked very spaced out. I didn't know what to do so I just continued to talk. "I am sorry I have to do this, especially with you. I do like you and I do want to date you, but the timing was just not right and I didn't want to make you wait for something when I am going through this." He then nods and leans in a bit. "I understand, Willa. It just wasn't the right time and you just aren't ready, especially with your ex now back. It just doesn't seem fair for you to date me while also struggling to handle being around your ex."