36.

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I got home after eating some ramen at a convenience store, it was tasteless, or maybe it was because I tried not to cry my whole way home. I was angry, I felt embarrassed and I just wanted mother earth to swallow me in that moment and spit out in my beloved Australia.

I filled the bathtub and since I was already wearing a swimsuit underneath, I discarded my clothes on the floor and got inside as soon as it was ready. I rested my head on the edge of the tub while feeling the water swallowing my body. I let some tears out and they mixed with the water of the tub that was cooling second by second.

A knock on the door brought me back to reality.
-What?- I asked.
-Are you naked?
Always so straightforward.
-Why do you care?
-I'm gonna take that as my cue to enter.
I heard the door knob turning around to let Haru in, the curtain of the bathtub still between us.
-What do you want?
-To talk.
-You? Talk? Since when?
-Since now, listen, I'm sorry- I saw his hand taking the curtain and sliding it softly, like waiting for me to stop him.
When I saw his face his eyes were buried on mine, not daring to look down.
-Relax, I'm wearing a swimsuit.
Haru let out a sigh of relief and his features relaxed. I smiled briefly at the sight.
-I don't need your apology Haru.
-Why?
-I know it's not sincere, Makoto probably told you to say something, but don't bother. Now, can you leave? I wanna be alone, I'm starting to get why you like this so much.
-Noah,...
-It's fine, I know you won't change your mind about Rin and me, I get it and I don't expect you to do otherwise.
-I thought it would make you feel better.
-I don't need a lie to make me feel better.
-Did I make you cry?
-Get out Haruka.
He left without another word.

I complain about other people being difficult, getting worked up about nothing, but I'm no better than them. I'm being very sensitive and temperamental, but I don't know what to do to stop myself.

When the water was already cold, I looked at my fingers that seemed like raisins by then, I touched them. I just need to clear my head and apologize if it's necessary to bring balance to my life again.

I got up and dried my body with a towel, I went to my room and put on a tracksuit, before leaving the flat.

I need to chill out, I need to chill out, I need to chill out... I'm just overreacting to everything now.

I walked to the park nearby while doing some stretches, none of my acquaintances go there so I guess I won't run into any of them. I just hoped jogging would help, my eyes were surely red and puffy and just waiting the time to let another downfall of tears free.

After around 20 minutes, I spotted another figure running way behind me, since it was dark I couldn't see who it was, but it was definitely a him. I put my jacket cap over my head and I tried to run faster, but the guy was shorting the distance between us. I didn't give up and continued my path, I had to get to the center of the park which was well illuminated. I could feel the temperature decreasing, my hands were as cold as the ice and my nose was a bit sore.

There was just another turn to get to the center, but once I got there I couldn't decrease much of my speed as I expected and the stones on the path didn't help at all. I tripped and felt pain on my head, shoulder and ankle.
-Shit- I heard someone say.
I tried to get up fast to get away from that shady person but he was already towering me.
-Don't move, stay there- he commanded.
I was prepared to scream but as soon as my mouth opened, I found myself at a loss of words. I looked at his face for the first time when he kneeled down and I felt the biggest relief ever... It was Sousuke.

He examined briefly my ankle and sighed, he looked at my face with his gentle teal eyes and wiped my tears away. I hadn't even realized I was crying. Then, he took me in his arms bridal style and walked quickly to the exit without a word.

I remember there was a clinic nearby, and since we weren't heading to my flat, I assumed he was taking me there.
-It's really cold Noah, you should have brought another jacket or at least some hot packs.
-I didn't think of that, I just wanted to be alone.
Indeed it was really cold that night, so I unconsciously rested my head on his warm chest and hugged his shoulder to support me better. I noticed the fabric of his jacket, it was as light as mine but I didn't have the energy or will to scold him or say anything really.

When we got to the clinic, there was few people inside waiting, so in about 20 minutes we were called by one of the nurses. Sou wanted to carry me again, but I would be too embarrassed so he just held my arm as support and waited outside.

About half an hour later, the doctor had taken an x-ray of my ankle and foot and had put a bandage on the foot. Since my sneaker wasn't ideal to use for the time being, he gave me a navy blue boot after tending to my other not so minor scratches. I looked myself in a mirror in his office and I looked like I was attacked by scissors.

As soon as I got outside, Sousuke walked up to me while I was struggling with the crutches.
-Careful, you have to put almost all your weight in your good foot and move both crutches at the same time before balancing yourself and moving your body forward, then you shift your weight to the crutches- Sou explained.
It sounded easy, until I tried it. Maybe I didn't get it or he didn't say it right. I don't know. Sou chuckled and waited for me to get comfortable with those two sticks. I "practiced" around the waiting area since it was almost empty. I got it soon enough.

-What did the doctor say?- the teal-eyed asked once we were out in the cold.
-I sprained my left foot so I can't move it a lot and I must use these guys. Also, I should take it easy for 5 days and take some pills, I already have another appointment to check on it next week.
-So you're not going to uni?
-In two days I will, once the pain decreases. He gave me some sort of permit for disability leave.
-If you're in pain, I could carry you.
-No, it's fine. I can do it.
-Noah...
-I already took some pills, the pain will lower in a bit.
-The doctor said to take it easy.
-Yeah, but...- before I knew it I was already in the air and the crutches were held by both of my hands in front of me.
-You're too stubborn- Sou said once I was secure in his arms.
-I'm really amazed of how carrying a person seems to be nothing to you.
-I'm in a good shape.
-Show-off- I whispered.
-When will you get back to swimming?
-Probably after my next appointment
-Good, it's a bit boring without you.
And then I remember...
-I made a scene today, didn't I?
-Not really, we didn't hear what you and Rin talked. But we asked him and couldn't believe our ears.
-Why?
-It was so stupid, Rin's reason for you to leave wasn't logic. I mean, yeah maybe you didn't eat well but who does? We're university students.
I chuckled.

We didn't say anything else afterwards, until we got to my building.
-You don't have to come all the way up, I can handle it, there's a lift- I said.
-If you don't want me near you, just say so.
-It's not that, I already cause a lot of trouble for you.
-How exactly?- he said furrowing his eyebrows.
-You couldn't finish your run and wasted a lot of time at the clinic.
-To be honest, I was on my way to your flat after practice and I saw you heading to the park so
I followed you... You seemed like you needed to clear your head, so I went for a run as well, I was planning on talking to you when you were finished.
-You sure are one of a kind.
-I know- he said smirking.
-But really, I'll take the lift.
Sou sighed and put me down carefully. Once I got ahold of the crutches he let me go completely.
-It's late and you cannot put pressure on that foot, so go on now- he said pressing the button for the lift to open.
-Thank you Sousuke.
-It's nothing.
-No, really, thank you. I'm lucky you were creeping on me earlier- I grinned.
He rolled his eyes but grinned as well.
-See you tomorrow Noah.
I nodded.
The doors were about to close, but he stopped them with his hands.
-And if you wanna talk, we can meet tomorrow for lunch. I know you weren't upset just because Rin told you to leave.
My eyes widened a bit, but I nodded.
-Night Sou.
He winked and let go of the doors.

*****
Sousuke is just so cute <3

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