This chapter has a special guest star that all of my friends hate, apparently!
Cholesterol: I think I gave myself a black eye
Voldemort: What'd you do?
Cholesterol: So I was throwing my stress ball at my bedroom walls like I normally do
Voldemort: ...
Cholesterol: I'm a maladaptive daydreamer, sue me!
Voldemort: I'm still confused about how you gave yourself a black eye...
Cholesterol: So, as I was saying, I was throwing my stress ball against the wall when I misjudged the angle of my throw, and hit myself in the face.
Cholesterol: You're laughing at me rn, aren't you?
Voldemort: I swear I'm trying to stop lol
Cholesterol: It's not funny!
Voldemort: You're going to have a black eye for the first day of school!
Cholesterol: Shut up.
Voldemort: People are going to think you're a delinquent
Cholesterol: This is why I don't talk to you
Voldemort: I thought it was because of what happened in eighth grade
Cholesterol: We don't talk about eighth grade in this household!
Voldemort: Because of me or Payton?
Cholesterol: Payton, of course.
Voldemort: I'm pretty sure she's the devil.
Cholesterol: It's actually hilarious looking at my phone and seeing Voldemort calling a 15 year-old the devil.
Voldemort: Why am I Voldemort in your phone again?
Cholesterol: Because, back in the olden days when I had a crush on you, I refused to say you name to my friends, so, one day, Savana called you he-who-must-not-be-named, and I took that as an obvious reference to Voldemort.
Voldemort: Fair enough
Voldemort: Makes more sense than that time you kidnapped me.
Cholesterol: Was it really kidnapping though?
Voldemort: Yes.
Cholesterol: You got in the car willingly!
Voldemort: You showed up at my house in the middle of the night and stood outside for twenty minutes before you actual rang the doorbell!
Cholesterol: I wasn't sure which house was yours!
Voldemort: You could have texted me!
Cholesterol: That would have taken the fun out of the kidnapping!
Voldemort: I KNEW IT!
Voldemort: Told you so.
Cholesterol: At least I returned you. That's all that matters.
Voldemort: ...
Cholesterol: And you got to meet my cousins, which it always a plus
Voldemort: They were nice
Cholesterol: See, don't pretend like you didn't enjoy being kidnapped by me.
Voldemort: Honestly, we're so messed up that that sentence didn't even sound wrong.
Cholesterol: We're so messed up that we joke about a lot of shit that isn't funny. I think it's a gen z thing.
Voldemort: True
Voldemort: You should probably go to sleep. We have school in the morning.
Cholesterol: Can I just drop out of school and become a clown?
Voldemort: Go to sleep, Chloe.
Cholesterol: 'Night, Robert
Voldemort: Goodnight
YOU ARE READING
The Group Chat
Teen FictionThis story is based off of actual conversations my friends and I have in our group chat. It all started with a simple crush. Maybe this all would have been avoided if said crush wasn't sitting at the same table as me and all the friends I wanted to...
