Finding Myself

Dinner

The world seems to just go around me as if there is nothing to hold it in place. I look out my window and at the clouds as they rolled over each other. How peaceful and calming it is. I wish I would be able to feel as light as a cloud for just one day. Care free, feel free..... pain free. Oh, how nice that would be.

But this is the real world. None of that bullshit happens. Pain is real, and for some people, is always present. You can't just wave a magical wand and make life better. Sorry Fairy Godmother, Cinderella can't just turn into a princess in this world. It's just not realistic.

I snap out of my thoughts by a loud pounding on my door. I look over at the door from the sudden noise. "Come in."

Zachary walks in and gives me a charming smile. I stand up from the bed and give a half assed smile. "Dinner will be done in a few minutes if you are hungry."

"I'm starving." I say but look down at my feet and images of Mikes bloody face flash into mind. The blood trailed down his face and to the floor in a small puddle. His eyes filled with red furry. "But I'm not eating. Thanks anyway."

"How are you starving but refuse to eat?" He asks and I shrug. His face is filled with confusion as he walks over to me. I look down at his hands and see small bruises and cuts over them. He seems to follow my gaze as he stands in front of me with his hands out. "They don't hurt if that's what your...."

"That's not what I'm thinking about." I snap looking him in his eyes. They seem to soften when he reads the anger in my voice.

"Did I do something?" He asks confused, his face still hard as a rock as if he wants to know the answer but doesn't care enough if I don't tell him.

I laugh at his question. "Are you serious?" His brows furrow together showing he doesn't follow. "You find out that someone gave me a small bruise and you...."

"It's not just a small bruise..." He interrupts.

"And you beat the shit out of him? Over a mark on my skin?" I ask him. "I don't understand why you all think you can just solve every little problem with violence." Now is his turn to laugh, but the reaction doesn't flow to his eyes.

"You do realize you are staying in a gang house right? There's no 'hug and make up' situations here princess." He says and I cross my arms standing up again. We are inches away.

"Do not call me that. I know problems aren't solved that way. But beating the shit out of someone won't solve them either." I say in fury and he rolls his eyes. We both just stand looking at each other for a few minutes and I take note of his features. Sharp jawline, a cut on his eye brow, probably from a fight, dark eyes brows and soft eyes. His face appears hard as a rock but his eyes tell a different story. I smile as the realization hits me.

"Why are you smiling?" He asks confused again.

"You may act so tough, but I see through your image." He looks away from me then walks toward the door.

"Whatever you say princess." My stomach feels nervous for whatever reason. Maybe the fact I am in a freaking gang members house. "Now come on. Father wants you to be at dinner. And if he knows I offered to get you and you don't show, I get into trouble."

"No." I say while looking at him. He stops then turns around as if he has never had someone say no to him before. He slowly walks back to me.

"I'm sorry, but did it sound like a question?" He asks and I nod my head.

"Yes. Everything you try to say as a demand comes to me as a question." I tell him and he gives me a harsh look.

"Your going to be a pain in my ass, you know that?" He asks and I nod my head. He takes a deep breath in annoyance. "Okay princess. What do I have to do to get you to go downstairs?"