My Escape / 𝐜. 𝐜𝐮𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐧

Chapter 12

A week later, I found myself looking over at Paul, who was driving me to the hospital. I wasn't one hundred percent okay with driving right now. "Are you okay?" Paul asked all of a sudden. I frowned at him, not understanding. I heard him suck in a breath before he spoke up. "It's just that you've had a lot more appointments with Dr Cullen lately... and... you know you can talk to me too, right?" He asked slowly.

My frown deepened. "Paul, are you jealous of Carlisle?" His jaw clenched at my using of the doctor's first name.

"No, I shouldn't have to be because I'm your boyfriend, but I can't help but feel jealous because I know he's your mate!" He said a little louder.

He stopped in front of the hospital entrance. "You know what, Paul? I'm gonna leave you to think about all the reasons you don't have to be jealous, because I'm dating you not him!" I snapped, opening my door and getting out quickly before slamming it loudly, careful not to break it. In all honesty, lately things had been a little rough lately. After the kiss with Carlisle, I'd stayed away from Paul for three days, ignoring his calls and everything. I basically ignored everyone but Rae for those three days. Alice was still mad at me, Carlisle wasn't speaking to me, every time I wasn't looking Edward would watch me in pity, and everyone else kept nagging me about talking about what was wrong. I didn't want to talk anymore. I wanted everything to be back to how it was when we were all happy. To get there however, I knew I needed to hurt someone. I walk into the building quickly and storm past the nurse, who protests and tries to stop me, following me all the way to Carlisle's office.

"Miss, you can't go in there-" I cut her off by opening the door quickly. Carlisle looked up and chuckled lightly. "Sorry, Dr. Cullen. She didn't stop."

Carlisle sent her a smile and the nurse swooned. "It's okay. Lili has an appointment with me, and she's welcome to come to my office anytime."

The nurse nodded. "Right, Sorry again." She eyed me jealously as she left, closing the door behind her.

"Honestly, I think every nurse in this hospital is crushing on you. Even the married ones." I smiled and Carlisle scoffed.

"Whatever." He said. An awkward silence hung in the air. "I think we should talk about what happened."

I lean against the wall of his office, not wanting to sit near him right now. "Well, it's not like there's much you can do, anyways. You love the woman, and you have no feelings for me." In a flash, I'm pinned between the wall and his body, with either of his hands resting on the side of my head against the wall.

He leans in close so our noses are almost touching. "Who said, that I have no feelings for you?" He growls out.

"I did, Carlisle." I whisper. He leans in closer so our noses are touching and our lips are millimetres apart. He closes the small gap between us and connects our lips in a passionate kiss. I immediately melt into the kiss, but I pull away a few seconds later. "We shouldn't be doing this. This is wrong." I whisper quietly.

"But it feels so right." He says, leaning in and capturing my lips in another kiss, this one more slow and sweet. He was right. Nothing had ever felt right.

I push him away softly, but only far enough so our lips pull apart. His body is still pushing mine against the wall behind me. "That's just the mating pull talking." I look into his eyes.

"And what if it's right?" Carlisle asks, and I fight the urge to kiss him again.

"It's not. You love Esme, and she loves you, and you both live happily ever after. The end." I whisper, scared to use my full voice.

He pulls away quickly, putting at least a meter between us. "I'm sorry, I don't know what came over me..." He says quietly. Even though he says that, I know he doesn't regret it, and he knows I don't either.