Don't Gotta Be Drunk to Say It

Not Really Sipping on Anything, but a Short Story!

And I lay there, on my bed, tucked in and wishing to sleep.

12:10am.

It was dark, aside from my sister whom was laid across her bed using the laptop I just gave to her as a handme down. Our room was dark, it was a mess. We kept telling each other we'd clean it, it's been three days now and each day we say it. I picked up two piles of clothes today and threw them in the wash. Well not really the wash, but that's what I say, what we all say. It just means dirty clothes. I put the piles in the dirty clothes, we all say that too. It just means hamper.

In-the-wash:in-the-dirty-clothes:hamper.

That's real rationality for you.

As I said it's dark, actually it's storming too. The only thing lighting up my room is the lightening, aside from my sister's computer that is. I never was scared of storms until I found out that my state could have tornadoes too. Here in America we have what we call: Tornado Alley. It's essentially the Midwest and Central America, an area super prone to tornadoes. In elementary school they make it seem like that's the only place tornadoes happen in our land.

Wrong.

I found out that was wrong at the ripe age of thirteen (a bit on the older side but oh well) when the first North Carolinian tornado I've heard of hit, and hit pretty close to where I live to be honest. After that, I could never sleep easy during storms. Every storm that happens I swear up and down that it'll be the one bearing a tornado.

Dreadful right?

That reminds me, they often say tornadoes sound akin to trains whizzing on by. Well, I got a story about that. It can be sad or funny, your choice.

I was out walking my dog. See, we live on a barely two car neighborhood road. It's just us and the neighbor to the left. Just us two houses. Now the guy that own our two houses has a plot of land right across from us, a hop over that road. It's big enough for two suburban houses. Three if he's feeling ambitious. Well anyway, I took my dog PD for a walk in that plot of land. It was time for him to go out and pee. It was cloudy that day, grey in the sky. I was expecting it to rain. All of a sudden though, I hear this rattling, I hear a calamitous roar. It was hearty and rough and blaring. My mind goes: grey sky + train noise = TORNADO! I grab up PD, he's only a miniature poodle, and dash into the house. Lucky for me my bedroom door is the first to the right as soon as you step into the house. It was supposed to be the living room but we didn't make it that. I dash to my closet and start digging out the clothes and Rubbermaid containers. We don't have a basement or anything so my family has to hide in our closets during a tornado. I'm thinking of my life and my dog's and I'm digging and clearing out my closet like it too.

Then I hear the loud holler of a train whistle. I freeze, my heart racing with the feeling of butterflies. It must have jumped up my throat. Another train horn blares and I fall to the floor laughing and shaking. PD just looks at me like I'm crazy. Perhaps I am. How did I forget that I lived right smack next to a train track, not even a road away from it actually.

My pessimistic side always wins.

12:31am

I'm not sure how long I've been pessimistic. Most likely since elementary school. It started with the creepy crime shows my daycare teacher would play, at night of all times. Pretty inappropriate if you ask me. I asked her to change the channel once because it was scaring me. She told me not to watch it if I didn't like it. How was I suppose to do that? I couldn't go to the play room by myself because the show had already freaked me out. Plus the daycare building was haunted, even the adults said so.

Anyway, they weren't shows like CSI: Miami or Law and Order. They were those real life shows about real cases. To me the worst part was, and still is, composite sketches. Those will never not scare me.

And to add to that, I always think a serial killer is out to get me. I never had these fears before my time spent trying to tune those shows out at daycare. However, the earliest fright I can remember was when I was 6 or so. I had watch Child's Play and couldn't sleep because I thought Chucky was after me.

I can't remember why I was saying all this...

12:40am

Oh right! I'm pessimistic by nature. I always think of the bad before the good. If my friends and I are chatting, I'm sure to be the Debbie Downer of it all. Actually, ironically, most times I am the most rational and realistic. I say that is ironic because as I lay in bed I think of the most irrational and unrealistic things a person can think of. And it only ever happens when I'm supposed to sleep. Is it because I'm a pessimist? Well being a pessimist has in turn led me into being a paranoid person too. I'm scared to sleep without my giant three foot rabbit and without a blanket covering all of me, even my head. I also must be against a wall to get the most comfortable sleep. I have other paranoias that aid to my pessimistic ways.

For instance, the bedroom door is at the foot of my bed. Constantly I think of it creaking open, slowly, excrutiatingly painful in the amount of time it takes to open up. Once it does however, two things may look around the door and at me.

1.) A Grey alien come to do whatever.

It's a funny thing. Aliens in general do not scare me. Meeting one and the inability to know what they're capable of doing to me and if I am in enough esteem and ability to stop them is what scared me. I imagine that he walks into my room. 7 times out of 10 I'm scared out of my pants. I think of everything he can do to me and how I can't stop it.

2.) A serial killer will slaughter me.

I'd rather not elaborate here but just know that I do elaborate on this subject in my mind, more often than I'd like to. On a good night (well I should say bad since its preventing me from sleeping but the saying goes as "on a good-" so what can I say besides that?), on a good night I can come up with four ways in the least of my demise.

Ghosts are another thing that keep me up. You'll never find me initially going to sleep on my back or my face not looking at a downward tilt while I'm on my side. This is because I'm scared that when I open my eyes the face of a deceased person, good or bad, or even a demon will greet me.

1:00am

My eyes hurt now anyway as I tell you all this. I'm lying on my back and looking up at the stucco ceiling of my room. It's dark and the thunderstorm has ended. No tornado, thankfully (that I know of, not on my side of town at least). Just a scatter brained girl in a dark messy room.

1:10am

God, why can't I sleep?