Undercover (Larry Stylinson)

17. dirty little secret

Trigger: bulimia

"Hello? Is this Harry?"

Harry's breathing nearly stopped when he heard the voice on the other end of the phone. He had been waiting for this phone call for nearly a week. Now he was finally getting it and he had absolutely no idea how to say.

"Y-yeah," Harry breathed. He held onto the counter, knuckles white as he struggled to stand. "Ni, I'm so glad to hear your voice."

"Me too," Niall replied. His chipper Irish accent was still the same, but Harry could tell there was something missing from his voice. That he probably had that far away look in his eyes - the same one he got when he thought about his cousin who drowned in a lake on his thirteenth birthday.

Only this wasn't about his cousin. This was about his kidnapping. And Harry was not prepared to talk about that right now.

"I... I missed you so much, I'm so sorry," Harry said. He promised himself he wouldn't cry but the tears were already flowing and he could only hope that Niall couldn't hear the soft gasps he was letting out.

"Harry," Niall said sternly. "I don't really want to talk about that right now. It's... too much."

"Oh, I'm sorry," Harry said. His cheeks had turned a nice rosy shade and he had slid down against the cabinets now, taking a seat on the tile floor.

"It's okay," Niall replied. "Sorry I snapped, it's just. You know..."

Harry nodded, remembering all too well the hysterical breakdowns and mood swings he had when he fled back to the states. Fuck, he still had them a lot of the time.

"I know. And I'm here for you," Harry said. "Whatever you need."

"Thanks, Harry," Niall replied. "Where are you by the way? I'm back in New York. Doesn't feel right without you here?"

"I'm in Massachusetts," Harry replied.

"Why the fuck are you there?" Niall nearly snorted.

"Long story," Harry sighed. "But I'll come visit you, yeah? Soon as possible. Like tomorrow! Or tonight!"

"Slow down, lad," Niall said. "Why don't I come to you?"

"Are you crazy? You literally just.... got back," Harry said, his eyes widening.

"I'm okay to travel, Harry. I'm obviously shaken up but I'm not delusional," Niall replied.

"Right," Harry said. "Right, but I don't want it to be any trouble for you."

"It's not," Niall replied. "I'll book my tickets and come in a few days."

"Okay," Harry said. He didn't agree with the plan and would much prefer he be the one making the long trip, not Niall. But he knew how stubborn his best friend was, and there was honestly no use in trying to convince him once his mind was made up.

"Great, it's a plan then," Niall said in a peppy tone.

"Okay," Harry said, warily. He paused for a moment, and then lowered his voice. "But really, how are you, Ni? Are you okay?"

Silence greeted him on the other end of the line.

Several seconds went by before Niall weakly said, "I'm hanging in there."

And that's all Harry needed to hear. He was hanging in there too. And by hanging in there, he meant hardly hanging on

******************

"Louis!" Liam called through the flat. Of course no one replied.

"Louis," he repeated. "I get that you're mad and not talking to me but we have to go to the parent teacher conference right now and -- oh fuck!"