DARLIN' , tom holland

lxiii. | real life

she's awake.

tom walked quickly down the halls, his feet thudding harshly onto the ground.

tom come as quick as you can, she's awake.

the british lad's head swirled with thoughts, his own heartbeat booming in his ears. his palms were sweaty,  and he felt as if he was going to be sick.

tom slowed down as his eyes met gwen's. the girl nodded, beckoning him to come forwards. gwen twisted the doorknob, letting herself and tom inside a particular room in the awful hospital.

tom looked around the room, seeing all of the xaviers' in there. his eyes darted to the bed, his heartbeat quickening as he saw the woman he loves with his entire being, awake.

"arisa," he whispered, not believing what he was seeing. she was finally awake— looking incredibly tired but awake.

"i'm sorry, do i know you?"

tom felt his heart stop, it felt like his entire world just crashed and burned right in front of him. no, no, no. please tell me this isn't true, he would chant in his head over and over again.

and suddenly, the girl did the last thing tom thought adamaris would in that particular situation— she laughed. it sounded like a song in his ears, but he was still so confused.

"tom, i was kidding. come here," arisa smiled, extending a hand towards him. tom furrowed his eyebrows, walking towards the bed hesitantly.

"jesus christ, holland, you don't need to be scared," arisa snorted. however, the puzzled expression plastered on tom's face never faltered. "i- what?"

"she doesn't have amnesia, she really does remember you," oliver xaviers' voice piped in, amusement laced in his tone. "she thought it would be hilarious to give you a little scare. i thought it would be a little too much but she was right— it's quite hilarious."

tom's jaw dropped, the boy looking at all the smiling faces in the room. hell, even arisa's parents looked amused at the boy who looked a little too similar to a lost puppy in that moment.

"i think we should leave you both alone for a moment," victoria xaviers spoke up. agreements were thrown around the room and the xaviers family, along with gwen, exited the room, leaving tom and arisa alone.

"so are you just going to stand there and stare at me or-? because there's no point in staying here if you aren't going to say anything at all," arisa joked.

tom cleared his throat and scratching the back of his neck in both embarrassment and awkwardness, slowly walking nearer to arisa.

"hey, i already told you not to be scared, didn't i? i'm not going to scream and attack you like some monster."

"right, i'm sorry." arisa gave the boy a small smile, stopping the laugh that wanted to escape and sitting up a little more. "so, um— how long have you been awake?" nervousness and a hint of fear was clear in the way tom had spoken— not fear of arisa but fear for arisa. to put it simply, tom was scared that this was all a dream and he would lose her all over again.

"an hour? two at most," arisa had told tom with a shrug of her shoulders. "they wouldn't let me see anyone for the first half, the nurses insisted that they perform a few tests to make sure everything was alright and obviously, everything in me is okay but you, on the other hand— well, you look like the hulk just threw you on the ground over and over again."

"me?" tom had asked incredulously, "what would you call yourself, then?"

"i'm not the one who looks like i haven't slept for at least a year— maybe even a whole century," arisa said to the boy.

"i don't think you would be able to sleep either if you keep thinking that you're the reason why the person you love went through hell and back," tom replied quietly.

"tom," arisa frowned and grabbing his hand. "gwen was right, you really do keep blaming yourself. alright, look— i know you're sorry. you got mad and you broke my heart a little, so what? you're not the reason why i have a shitty ex-boyfriend, you're not the reason why he's borderline psychotic, you're not the reason why he wanted to come and get me. you're blaming yourself because you weren't there for me and you didn't try to understand the situation— you were away because you were spending time with your family, that's like a normal thing to do. your reaction? that's how any functioning human would be. to be honest, i would be angry at you if you dismissed the conversation as a whole and pretend it doesn't even exist. i'd feel like you didn't care at all if that's what you did."

"i'm sorry," tom apologized once more which earned a snort from arisa. "you've apologized so much already, i'm staring to get sick of the word."

"did you— did you hear anything when i talked to you?"

"tom, this isn't like the movies or those books wherein someone talks to a person in a coma and they can hear whatever is said. it's just like talking to someone who's asleep so no, i didn't hear you. though, i could already imagine what you might've said."

"i'm honestly still so surprised that you don't hate me and aren't calling security," tom admitted. arisa sighed, controlling herself. "if you don't stop thinking that i despise you, i really will fucking castrate you, holland."

"okay, no need to get violent." that earned a flat look from the girl which made tom laugh. "i missed you, arisa."

"come here," arisa had demanded, opening her arms. tom raised an eyebrow but pulled her into a hug anyways, feeling content that she was back into his arms, just like it was supposed to be.

suddenly, arisa felt the boy shake, soft sobs escaping him. she tightened her arms around him, burying her head further into his chest. tears started pricking her eyes and arisa attempted to blink them away but they just kept coming.

"i'm not going to leave you again, i promise," tom spoke quietly. arisa stayed silent, still hugging him as if it was the last thing she'd ever do.

—♚—