Desire or Revenge (Cancelled)

Chapter 2: How it began (part 2)

It was a traumatic experience, I will never forget what happened on that horrible day. Seeing your father shot ruins you and what's worse, they took my mother and I have no idea where they took her.. But I plan to find her and that's a promise! If she's even alive...

Blood exploded from my father's head, splattering the walls and then the floors as he fell face front onto the ground. My mother let out a muffled scream of pain as her mouth was shut by her capturer. Igor straightened out his grey blazer with now had a few blood spots and slicked back his hair.
"I'll need a new one of these." And with that he and his accomplices left with my crying mother.

As soon as they left I rushed to my father sobbing. I desperately tried to revive him but it was impossible, no one could survive a gunshot to the brain... His blood was pooling all over our wooden deteriorated floor, the sight was haunting, but I refused to leave. I remember crying all day beside my father, unsure of what to do next.

It was the next day when a whole bunch of police and medics rushed in through our unlocked door. It turned out my neighbours heard all the shouting and went to check on us when they didn't hear from us for a while. The medics placed my father onto a stretcher and covered him up in a body bag. And that was the last time I saw my father.

The police took me to the police station and were asking me so many questions. But I could not focus, the image of my dead father was glued into my brain. I couldn't eat nor sleep, it was like I was dead myself. For the next few days a kind police officer was looking after me, his name was Mickey, he was from America and he had the kindest heart. He always consoled me and helped me with the troubles I was having. Even though I had lost my parents Mickey always managed to cheer me up! And I loved him dearly, he was the closest thing I had to a father. We would play hide and seek in his small flat and stay up late watching movies and stuffing our faces with popcorn! And soon enough my trauma began to heal.

But, I couldn't stay with him forever... After that I got moved from orphanage to foster homes to more foster homes. No body wanted me. I was a weird outsider with no emotions, but how could I have emotions ?! I had just lost my parents in a brutal way! A lot of the time I would sneak off to Mickey's house and spend time with him.

Sadly after a while he moved back to America and I was left all by myself. This broke me, I felt so lost and alone. My foster parents would often be mean to me. They would not give me enough food or sometimes kick me out. To get food I'd have to steal and I hated it. I knew it was wrong but I needed to, for my survival. I would often get caught and sent to the police station.

My foster parents would have to come and get me which I really hated. At home they would beat me and say fostering me was their biggest mistake and their life long sorrow. I had learnt to accept this over time even though it hurt me badly and damaged me to the person I am today. I attended school until I was sixteen but even that was awful. Everyone knew that I was an orphan and I was judged for this.

As I got older I got mixed up with few different  gangs. I would do jobs for them in exchange for food and a roof over my head as I didn't want to stay with my foster parents. A lot of times I would be breaking the law but as time went on I grew to love it! The excitement and danger was my addiction! This was the new me, the bad girl, the Phoenix! No more Cinderella loving, innocent girl, she was dead..

At seventeen I join the 'Coltelli' mafia. They were an Italian mafia of origin but they were situated all around the world. The gang became my new family. I learnt how to fight and how to handle a gun, they loved me. While it wasn't real love, it brought me the love affection that I was yearning for since my parents died.

Well the police didn't love me. The police would lock me up in a cell and Mickey's friends would sit on the other side of the cell lecturing me all the time, but this lecture here was well, different and life changing.

"Alexa, you are not a little girl anymore! You are breaking the law. Do you realise how disappointed Mickey is-"

"First of all it's Phoenix now and don't mention Mickey, he's gone and this is my life now!!" I said angrily hardly bothered to continue the same conversation we had a million times.

I was very hurt by Mickeys departure to America and I didn't want to talk about him.

"Actually Alex- em... Phoenix, there's something I'd like to speak to you about Mickey, he has invited you to America..."

I was shocked and speechless. How could I leave Italy my homeland ? I had lived here for all 20 years of my life.

"He had heard about your..struggles and wants to help you. He would provide you a home and possibly a career in the police department.if you'd you know, stop this fiasco. You would live with him in Los Angeles."

"Woah stop, I can't just leave my home, my family is here!"

"You mean your gang?? You going to America will create a great opportunity for you. Do you think joining a mafia is a good way to honour how your parents died? This will be your chance to get out of your misery!"

"What misery, I'm fine-"

"NO, joining gangs, stealing, fighting, that is NOT fine !! You are going, I promised Mickey!!"

And so with lots of convincing and manipulation, I left Italy and moved to Los Angeles to live with Mickey. It was a big struggle. It took Mickey a long time to pull me out from my old ways. For a long time my mind was fixated on drinking, fighting and stealing. But we did it!

I became an undercover police officer with Mickey's guidance. What irony right! Mickey is now the police captain of the town. My life had certainly got better, but I still had a hole in my heart and I didn't know what could heal it...
As for my gang, they didn't know I left but they are probably pretty mad for me leaving and sort of ratting them out...

And so we get to the point where I am now, however this story is far from over. This is just where the real story begins...