Fallen Angel

xvii

Trigger Warning: sexual assault

"Okay, are you ready?" Jace asked. Clary nodded and Jace submerged the blade in the fountain.

"Okay you'll need to name your blade first." Jace said.

"Heosphoros." Clary said.

"You're sure?" Jace asked.

"Yes." Clary said.

"You can change it to anything." Jace said.

"Heosphoros." Clary said.

"Okay. So you need to close your eyes and repeat after me." Jace said. Clary closed her eyes and waited for Jace to talk.

"Let the waters of this fountain wash this blade clean. Consecrate it to my use alone. Let me use it only in the aid of just causes. Let me wild it in righteousness. Let it guide me to be a worthy warrior of Idris. And let it protect me that I may return to this fountain to bless its metal anew. In Raziel's name." Jace said.

"Let the waters of this fountain wash this blade clean. Consecrate it to my use alone. Let me use it only in the aid of just causes. Let me wild it in righteousness. Let it guide me to be a worthy warrior of Idris. And let it protect me that I may return to this fountain to bless its metal anew. In Raziel's name." Clary said.

"Okay, open your eyes. We're all done." Jace said. Clary smiled as the light reflected off the blade.

"You are an official warrior of Idris." Jace said smiling. Clary was silent.

"Everything okay?" Jace asked, grabbing her hand.

"Yeah. Yeah everything is great." Clary said. She stood up and held out her hand.

"C'mon. I wanna go back to the house." Clary said. Jace stood and took her hand in his.

"Okay. Let's go."

+++

Jace watched as Clary walked towards the hallway before stopping and turning back to sit in the living room.

"Are you sure everything's okay?" Jace asked. Clary sighed.

"It's just all those people at the meeting today." Clary started.

"What did they do?" Jace asked.

"I hate the way they look at me, and the way they talk to me. They make me feel like I'm not a real Shadowhunter." Clary said.

"What do you mean?" Jace asked.

"We walked in and everyone looked at me. It's because they all know. They know that I was with Sebastian so they've all come to their own conclusions." Clary said, sitting in a large chair. Jace knelt in front of her.

"Clary..."

"And you can't say that's not what they were thinking. Because it was. Shadowhunters aren't very good at hiding their emotions. It's obvious what they're thinking." Clary said. Jace sighed softly.

"How do I fix it?" Jace asked.

"You don't have to fix everything." Clary said, getting to her feet.

"Clary, I want to help you." Jace said.

"And you can't help me with this!" Clary said.

"I can try." Jace said.

"What are you going to do. Go up to every Shadowhunter in Idris and say 'hey, that Clary Fairchild, she's really great'." Clary asked.

"If that's what it takes, then I'll do it. I just want you to be happy." Jace said.