where the time went- chloe price

because.

my heart was throbbing in my chest as i stood at chloe's bedroom door, ready to leave to go to blackwell. her hand lingered on mine before i opened the door, i looked up at her with timid eyes and a soft smile, she was almost frowning at me,
"i'm gonna be okay," i reassured her for the 20th time this morning,
"i just-," she sighed, "i just don't know what's gonna happen,"
"i told you," i said, "if anything that isn't apart of the plan happens... you're on speed dial and i'm getting out of there," i rubbed my thumb across her soft skin, she nodded stiffly before inhaling nervously, "i'm going to be okay, chloe," i titled her head up so she was looking down at me, she gave me a straight smile,
"i know you are," she whispered with a soft sniff and i noticed she was crying again, "i just-" she sniffed again, "rachel..."
"i'll find her,"
"what if it's... what if it's bad?"
"i'll find her," i felt myself welling up too, "no matter how i find her... i'm bringing her home, chloe," a tear slipped down my cheek and chloe quickly wiped it with her thumb. i held her hand in place on my cheek before i leant over and kissed her softly, the saltiness of her tears that slipped into her mouth falling into mine,
"i love you," she whispered once she pulled away from me, her lips still centimeters away from mine. anxiety rushed through my body and my limbs felt numb, but i opened my mouth and i spoke,
"i, um. i have to go," i whispered, her face fell but i gave her a short smile before speaking again, "i'm sorry," i stepped away from her and pulled my bag over my shoulder,
"okay," she replied quietly as she watched me walk towards her door,
"i'll contact you,"
"okay."

my heart was thudding nervously as i entered the classroom. i was on time for the lecture, knowing that there wasn't going to be any interaction between mark and i, or nathan and i but i still felt nauseatingly nervous. nathan was sitting at the desk next to mine, he kept trying to look at me to start a conversation but i ignored him, keeping my eyes on my notebook, not allowing myself to look at him and well up with tears again as the photos i saw yesterday would flash through my mind again.

i knew he wanted to talk, i hadn't replied to the 7 texts he sent me last night and i hadn't looked at him once. he knew something was up he just didn't know what, and i know that it was driving him crazy.
victoria was also here, being her usual self, acting as if nothing had happened yesterday. and unlike my coming out, everyone seemed to have forgotten about it. she was number one again.

when mark told us that class was over and everyone started packing up their belongings my hands started to shake, my heart fell forward and started hitting my rib cage almost painfully. but once everyone left and with numb fingers i packed up my belongings, making my way towards mark's large desk that he was sitting behind.
"hi," i spoke softly, scared i was going to throw up all over his desk. he looked up at me, his expression unreadable,
"hi, rosie," he spoke, a small smile falling across his lips before he stood, towering over me once more, "can i help you?" he asked and i nervously looked around the classroom making sure that no one was straggling. once i was confident the room was empty i stepped closer to him, dancing my fingers across the warm skin on his hand as i peered up at him.
i felt like i was going to be sick.
i didn't want to touch him.
   i didn't want to touch him.
       i didn't want to touch him.

i did not want to touch him, but the tips of my fingers stayed on his skin as i spoke.

"i have some photos that i need to produce, but," i said, "i can't do that in the awfully ventilated dark rooms that are provided here..."
"are you suggesting that you use my dark rooms at my home?" he spoke with raised brows, a smirk cast across my lips to attempt to hide the disgust crawling across my skin. i nodded softly,
"yes, i am,"
"okay." he spoke with a quick nod, "i'm leaving in about 15 minutes. do you need a lift?" i shook my head in response,
"no, thank you. i drove here," i said and he nodded before stepping away from me and started to pack his papers away, my fingertips growing cold and heartbeat slowing down only ever so slightly. "see you soon," i gave him a quick nod before turning on my heel and leaving the room, exhaling nervously as i walked down the halls and wiping my sweaty hands off on my jeans,