Love, Drugs and Cancer

Chapter 1: Chemotherapy

(If you have not read the prolouge, please go back and do so. Otherwise, the story won't make sense :D)

I sat in the car on a warm, sunny day, sunlight bursting through the trees and through the windows. In the pit of my stomach was a feeling of dread. I don't want to go through this treatment. Why won't my parents and the doctors just let me die? I'm going to anyways, so they mine as well save their money, their time and my pain.

Most kids would've been nervous to go to their first day of Chemo. They're nervous that they'll have terrible side effects or it won't work. But not me. I've already concluded that I'm going to die. I just wish that I didn't have to go through all of this hospital crap.

My parents and I pulled up to the hospital and parked. I stared up at the large white building, that pit of dread in my stomach growing like a disease.

I almost laughed at my joke, but decided that would be inappropriate, considering how this is probably going to kill me.

When my parents and I got out of the car, my mother had a river of tears on her face. Never had I seen her cry so hard in my life. The night that we figured out I had cancer, I had heard her crying in her bedroom, but never actually saw them. Not until now. The tears made me sad. I hugged and told her it was okay, that she didn't have to cry, but she wouldn't listen to me. She simply continued to cry. 

All too soon, I had to pull away from her and head into the hospital for my Chemo. Since I'm still a kid (a 16 year-old one. I hardly think I am classified as a child), the doctors keep me in the hospital for the first week of my treatment, at least. I need to be closely monitored, the Chemo makes my system weak and some of the side affects can be pretty dangerous.

I walked into the hospital, followed by my parents, one at each flank. I still wasn't scared. The only thing I was scared about was my mom. How is she going to react when I'm gone?

Quickly, I was greeted by a nurse, who brought me to my chemotherapy room. I was reassured that a doctor would be there soon. I said a quick goodbye to my parents before they were forced to leave the room. 

Once I was all alone, I let my mind race about my death. Should I write a Will? I mean, I'm only 16, but I'm also going to die of cancer. I have no money to give and no children to pass down to. I've never thought about my funeral arrangments. Well, with any luck, I'll have plenty of time to think on it. 

As my thoughts wandered, a doctor came in with a tray. He set the tray on my bedside table. On the tray were some crackers and a tall glass of water.

"We expect our patients to eat and drink this before the therapy. Your chemo treatment is going to be private, for now, but it may change depending on the day. Eat." He motioned at my crackers.

I picked up the crackers and started eating them. Still, no fear. Only dread of how long I have to sit here and my hair falling out.

"Your name is Samantha, correct?" My doctor asked.

"I prefer Sam." I replied.

"Sam. I'm Dr. Smith and I'm going to be your doctor throughout your cancer experience. I understand how scary this experience can be, and I'm here to talk if you ever need it. Now, let's get to the details.

"You have a late stage of AML. AML is usually treated in slightly higher doses and everyday for kids. Since you've been caught a little later, we're going to pick up the dosage a bit. This means that you're going to feel side affects a bit quicker than an average patient.

"You're treatment is going to last for two hours before we bring you to your hospital room, where you'll be staying for at least the next week. We will run some tests after the first week to see if you have gone into remission. The chances of going into remission after just the first week are very high for a child of your age, but we want you to keep in mind that every case is different and you aren't guaranteed the same results. If you need anything, we have a button that you can press to get my attention on the bedside table. We will bring you anything you need. And here, take these." Dr. Smith handed me two small, blue pills. Without questioning, I took the two pills.