The Mendes Boy

~rape~

"I don't know...... I don't know that answer" in a toneless voice

"You do know that answer..... you like him" the tone of her voice was  Modulated "what I do not like him" I trembled

" you're in denial you like him he likes you and it's okay to be afraid to let someone into your life after what happened to you"

"I'm terrified okay I can't let me like Mendes I just can't and I won't"

I talked to her more about how I was raped and what ever else happened to me I thought a lot about what she said I like him I didn't want to believe it I still don't

I was laying in my bed minding my own business when Shawn came up to my room and he got closer to me

"TAKE YOUR CLOTHES OFF NOW"  he demanded "no stop Shawn What are you doing"

"take your clothes off" "no" I cried "take them off" i was breathing heavily and shaking I was scared "Shawn no stop" before I knew it the Mendes boy i wanted to love

was hurting me like that disgusting monster that took advantage of me  it was happening all over again.....but this time the monster was Shawn Mendes....

I jumped from the nightmare I was having about Shawn I gasped as I woke up I started shaking and trembling I was terrified

I broke down in tears my roommate comforted me even though we aren't allowed to touch then the counselor came in I was breathing heavily and shaking still she hugged me

"It's okay, it was just a dream your okay relax" I took deep breaths

"It....was..him shawn..he was" I trembled then gulped I eventually calmed down then I took a nap normally were not allowed but I needed to calm down some more

After I woke up I was on dish duty it wasn't that bad I didn't like the food but oh well for the time in my life I mattered they needed me to do the dishes I did the dishes and thought about Shawn as I did them in spite of all the hell I've been threw he's always been able to make me smile but no I'm not falling for him I can't I have to keep him alive

...
I have been seeing the counselor that works there she is helping me she keeps telling me that it isn't my fault but I just don't believe her

This medium girl flew in to talk to me her name is theresa caputo

"Hi nice to meet you I'm theresa caputo usually I ask people if they ever been to a medium before" she explained to me

"No I haven't" I replied "okay so I want you to know that even though loved ones aren't here in the physical world they are here with you in the spiritual world" I nodded

"Okay I have a dad that's stepping forword and he says he's sorry that he wasn't a better dad to you and that he is sorry for how we left things..oh okay there's another male figure coming through the letters l i a m are together" I almost started crying "my brother his name was liam" I told her

"Oh okay that would be him that's stepping forward then and he says he just told his dad to step over it's his turn he says that you blame yourself for their death" I nodded