Reconstruct Me: A Jackson Avery Love Story (I Entered In The Wattys) :)

Chapter Twenty-Two: Loosing Him

Rowan's POV
It's been four months and Alex is still in a coma, it's been four months and I'm still living in this hospital, it's been four months. I still feel like it just happened yesterday and it still hurts like it just happened yesterday...i honestly don't know how to function. I've been in the hospital every day this is where i shower, eat, sleep, and go to the restroom. I am in Alex's room with him and Jo because she too has refused to leave until he wakes up, the others visit between rounds,surgery's, and all that good stuff and we try to keep it happy with stories and all that, but when everyone leaves Jo and i cry and cry and cry. I don't know how to be me without Alex and i think Jackson is starting to notice that..he was by my side non stop when it first happened and stayed with me and made sure i was ok, but after month one he didn't really understand why i wasn't coming home and seeking comfort in him. Now he just comes to see Alex and kisses me on the cheek, there is no more trying than that and I'm not mad because it's my fault really for shutting him out, but no one will understand what Alex means to me. Today has been uneventfully just like the others with just Jo and i on either side of Alex in the hospital bed starring at the tv not knowing what to say or do just like always until Jo breaks the normal routine. "Should we consider unplugging him?," she asks barley above a whisper and that is when i face her and my hand finds her cheek "get out," i yell at the top of my lungs and she just stares blankly at me. "Jo Wilson i want you out of this hospital room and i don't want you to come back until you hear he wakes up. That will give you time to realise how stupid you are for even thinking that," i finish as Jo slowly removes herself from Alex's bed and the hospital room. Lexie and Mark come in later to figure out what happened and i end up kicking them out as well, the rest of the night is spent alone and for once i feel ok enough to sleep.

The next morning still Rowan's POV
I wake up slowly with an arm around me, thinking it's Alex i sit up quickly and i realise it's just Mark, he has moved me onto the extra bed they put in here and is cuddled up sound asleep next to me. I carefully remove myself from his grasp and climb back into the bed with Alex and let my mind drift to all the times i have had with him and how i could never dream of letting him go. "Row i have bad news," Mark says some time later and i realise the worst thing possible has happened, "Jo is in charge of his life support and she wants to pull the plug huh?," i say starring directly in his eyes. Mark nods his head slowly and that is when i loose it, i sprint out of the hospital room, down the halls, past Lex and Jackson, out of the hospital doors, and right up to Jo who is sitting at a bench outside of the hospital. When she sees me she slowly stands and is about to spew out some bullshit reasoning as to why it is ok to unplug my best friend from the only thing keeping him alive, but before she gets the chance my fist connects with her face. "How could you claim you love him, how could you claim he is your best friend, how could you give up on him? If that was you he would never let you go and he would kill anyone who tried to take you from him, how could you do this?," i scream at her with tears in my eyes. She slowly lifts herself off the ground and wipes her bloody lip, " i know he told me not to let him go but i can't sit here and watch him rot away in front of me," she says before walking past me. "I'm having the plug pulled tomorrow at 5 I'm sorry," she finishes before she walks away, i run as fast as i can back to Alex and i just cry. What feels like hours later a slight knock is heard and then Jackson enters the room, " she shouldn't be able to do this im so sorry Row," he says barley above a whisper as he approaches me, i slowly lift my head and stare at Jackson not knowing what to say. With a heavy sigh he places a kiss on my forehead and slowly leaves and my heart breaks even more, i know he wants me to want him during this time but i can't focus on anything but Alex and i wish he understood. I spend the rest of the night just spewing out every possible phrase i can to Alex just to make sure he knows how much he truly means to me, i also make sure he knows Jo is doing this and how heartbroken i am. Pretty soon I'm laying next to him just starring at the roof knowing that in less than 24 hours i am going to loose my all time best friend, and along with him i will probably loose Jo and Jackson too. With negative thoughts running through my head i shut my eyes and let what sleep I'll be able to get wash over me.