The Deal

Chapter 32

The week had gone by very slowly. I felt as if every waking moment was dreadful and tiredsome. I had never felt so regretful in my life. I felt like I had spent every possible waking moment trying to apologize to Christian. I spent every moment trying to find something to say to him. I missed his smile, I missed his voice.

Now the only time I talked to him was when I was at work. But even then it was barely any talking at all. And every time he'd talk to me it'd be about work- usually at work. That was it, no other communication.

On top of that, I felt like none of it was worth it. Christian wasn't talking to me and that's all because I decided to be with someone who I just ended up wasting my time on. What about Alexander that felt so tempting to me at the moment? Was the risk that came with being with him? Was it his deep accent? Or his tall figure? I have no idea, but now the thought of him only made me want to vomit. I felt so disgusted with myself. What had driven me to make such horrible decisions?

"Mom- this dress is hideous," I say from the dressing room. Today my mother was finally picking out her wedding dress as well as my dress. Why had she placed me in a bright pink dress? I had no clue, maybe because she just wanted to keep her options open? Though I saw no reason why to put me in a bright pink dress that looked like a unicorn had vomited on it.

"Fine, try this one." My mother opened the dressing room door handing me a beige colored long dress with a sparkly rose gold top. I roll my eyes, grabbing it before taking off the pink dress and slipping on the new one. This seemed to be a lot better. It was actually very pretty and the color complimented my skin tone. Though it showed a bit too much cleavage for my liking.

"Have you found a dress?" I question my mother as I examined myself in the mirror. "Yes- though I'm not sure of it. I called Christian he agreed to stop by and look at it before I decide to spend his money and buy it." She said.

I bite my lip. "Christian is coming here...now?" I ask, my palms suddenly sweaty. "should be any moment hopefully. I seriously want to get out of this dress." I open the dressing room door. My mother stood before a big mirror that seemed to take up the whole wall.

She wore a white dress with a big skirt and tight sleeveless top. It was actually very pretty but she seemed to be unsure by the face she was making when staring at herself in the mirror. She turns to me, narrowing her eyes as she examined the dress she had given me to try on.

"Hmm..." She seemed to be thinking.

"I like it a lot. You look- well you look better than me!" She turns back in the mirror. "this is not the dress. Where did that lady go? I told her to fetch me one of those mermaid type dresses I swear she's been gone for like an hour." It had been in fact, like 10 minutes.

"I'm going to go change." I turn about to walk back in my dressing room when Christian suddenly walked back, alongside the lady that had been "fetching" that mermaid style dress for my mother. Christian had seemed to be saying something to her that resulted in her giggling in a flirtatious manner despite the obvious age difference. "Oh thank God! I've been waiting for this dress. Christian, how do you like this one?" My mother asks doing a slight spin to that Christian would be able to see the dress in full measure.

He smiled. "It's nice." He comments though he seemed partly uninterested. "This is my fiancé I was talking to you about." My mother bragged to the girl. "Awe, you two look like a sweet couple. Anyways here's the dress. I saw a different one on my way back up I'll go grab that as well." Before my mother could say anything else the lady disappeared back in the direction she had come from. "Thanks for coming Christian. I can seriously use a bit of advice since Zaina is of no help." My mother rolled her eyes before disappearing into her own dressing room with the dress the girl had brought her.

Christian looked my way suddenly, as if not realizing my presence earlier. He glanced up and down at my figure. "Per usual- your beauty doesn't seem to amaze me." He says, taking me back like a lot!

He had said little to nothing to me this past week and for the first time, he had genuinely said something to me that didn't have to do with work.

I gulp, not quite sure how to respond. "Thank you," I whisper, though I was frowning. I wasn't sure how to smile when I knew that he only said what he said because he still believed it to be true, though it meant nothing, he could still think I'm beautiful and hate me at the same time, right?

"I should go change." I push my thumb back behind me at my dressing room. He nods giving me the slightest of smiles before taking a seat on one of the chairs they had out here. I take a deep breath before going into my dressing room, sighing.

~~

Dress shopping had been alright. My mother had tried on about a thousand dresses before we were able to finally leave. Sitting next to Christian and waiting the whole time wasn't very ideal either. I kept wanting to talk to him, apologize but I knew I couldn't with my mother so close, so I found myself just sitting in silence and waiting for my mother to hurry up, actually more like praying that she'd hurry.

Finally, I found myself on my bed at home, catching up on homework that was due in a few days. I found it hard to focus. So much was on my mind. As much as I tried telling myself not to think about Alexander or Christian, I kept doing so. I know that Alexander and I are completely over and I want nothing to do with his smug face, but I couldn't help but go over the times we laughed, the times we had serious conversations. I can't decide whether those moments were fake or not? They seemed genuine at the moment but now I feel as if they weren't.

I honestly don't know what to think of it anymore, but does it even matter at this point?

"Zaina?" My mother didn't bother on knocking when she rudely burst through my door. I jumped, slightly taken off guard, too deep in my own thoughts.

"Yes, mother?" I roll my eyes, looking back down at my homework.

"I moved the engagement party to two weeks from now. Tuesday I'm leaving out of town for only a couple of days, my company wants me to write a piece someplace in New York but that means I'll be missing Christians company party Thursday night." She points out. I narrow my eyes. What company party was she talking about?

I hadn't heard of a party that was happening and I technically work for Christians company!

"Wait what party?" She seemed to frown, probably a little mad that I didn't pay any mind to the fact that she was moving her engagement party up a few weeks or that she was going out of town.

"The masquerade type ball that Christians company is throwing. I was supposed to go, of course as Christians date. But I informed him you'll be going with him, not as his date of course but as his plus one." She says. I nod slowly. A masquerade ball? How fancy did that sound? It definitely sounded like something my mother would be all down for. Not only was she a huge fan of dressing up for fancy parties but she loved extravagant dresses and fancy champagne served on silver platters.

I swear my mother was meant to be rich, perhaps in another life?

"Fine. That sounds fine." I frown, realizing that these next two weeks I'd have two different fancy parties to attend. The masquerade ball and my mother's fake engagement party, how fun?!