It'll Never Be The Same

Home sweet...NO!!

Reid POV

I walk into the BAU and start towards the coffee. It's my normal routine.

"Hey Spence." I hear JJ call from behind me.

"Hey" I manage to give a small smile and wave.

"It's really great to have you back" she gives me a warm smile and hugs me.

"It's great to be back" I say while pulling away from the hug.

I walk up to the conference room to say hi to everyone.

"Hey Reid." Hotch said, shaking my hand. Everyone took their turn saying hi to me and wishing me my best. Everyone but Derek.

I see Derek walk up to the conference room. I quickly told everyone that I had to go just as Derek got to the door.

"Bye guys" I wave to everyone and turn to the door. Before Derek could say anything, I pushed him to the side and walked out.

"What was that about?" I hear JJ ask before I leave.

**Time Skip 3 days**

I've been home for 3 days while everyone else was out on a case. I couldn't stop thinking about all the things that happened to me while out in the woods. I've been using Dilaudid the whole time. I've been really depressed and angry. I can't seem to deal with it. I just want it all to be over.

"FUCK!!" I yelled out after dropping my book for the 4th time. I starting bawling my eyes out. I'm so fucking done.

After crying for what felt like an hour, I walk over to my bathroom. I pull out my phone and text Derek.

(S-Spencer D-Derek)

S- Hey Derek, have you guys finished the case yet?

D- Hey, yeah. We're about to leave. What's up?

S- Just wondering. I haven't heard from JJ.

D- Oh okay...

I turn off my phone and sit down on the floor of the bathroom. I pull out the Dilaudid and my needle. Sitting on the floor crying I thought of the one thing I wanted to do. I pulled out my old razor blade and filled the needle full. I decided to text Derek. Looking at my phone I saw that it's been 3 hours. They should be back by now.

S- Derek. I'm sorry. I was a dick to you. All you we're trying to do was help me and I yelled at you. I'm so sorry. Please tell the team that I'm sorry. I don't want to hurt anyone. I'm so sorry.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Derek's POV

We just got back from the case. I'm feeling bad about hurting Reid. I shouldn't have yelled at him the way I did. I just want to see him to apologize.

The case was a bad one so everyone was gonna go out for drinks. We all walk into the BAU to meet Garcia. As we meet her I feel my phone vibrate. I look to see its Spencer.

S- Derek. I'm sorry. I was a dick to you. All you we're trying to do was help me and I yelled at you. I'm so sorry. Please tell the team that I'm sorry. I don't want to hurt anyone. I'm so sorry.

"FUCK!!" I scream and turn to the stairs running. Before I leave I hear Hotch tell JJ to go after me. I start running to my car ignoring the calls from JJ. She caught up to me and got in my car. I rushed over to Reid's house.

"Why are we here?" She asked

I ignored her and ran in. She follows not far behind me. I run into his bathroom to see him laying on the floor in a pool of his own blood with a needle in his arm.

"BABY BOY!!" I cried pulling him into my arms. JJ runs in and sees me holding a limp Reid.

"CALL 9-1-1!!" I yell to her. She pulls out her phone and calls.

I ride in the ambulance with Reid to the hospital. I was holding his hand the whole time.

**Time Skip 45 minutes**

JJ called the rest of the team and told them to come to the hospital. I stand there covered in his blood.

"What happened?" Hotch questioned.

"He...he tried... To.. Um... He tried to kill himself..." I shuddered out.