Learn To Live Again | Namkook

Chapter 23

Namjoon POV

I'm nearly asleep at this point, as Tae and I wait for Hoseok to return with Jungkook. Suddenly, there's a sudden quiet knock on the door. Both of us snap awake as we look between each other with a small frown before Taehyung gets up to go check.

Though, seconds later, Hoseok walks in while carrying Jungkook. I frown, worried as I jump up from the couch. Taehyung just shakes his head at me though, causing me to simply stand there as Hoseok walks right through us and towards the bedrooms.

Taehyung gently grabs my arm and leads me back to the couch before sitting the both of us. A couple minutes later, Hoseok comes back out and walks over to the fridge. I watch curiously and worried as he grabs out three beers and brings them over to us before walking back to the kitchen again. This time, he gets a glass of water and heads back to Jungkook's room.

Finally, he returns to us and sits down on the other couch in the room where Taehyung is sat. He looks exhausted.

"How is he?" Taehyung asks softly, opening the beer he'd been given as Hoseok does the same.

"He's struggling, Tae. He really misses them and I think tonight's the first time he's really acknowledging that." Hoseok answers softly.

"What do you mean?" I speak up, wanting to understand more. The two boys look between each other.

"He said he'd tell him if he asked, Tae. After tonight though, I don't think he's had any intentions to actually talk about it." Hoseok says with a small frown. Taehyung nods in response.

"Hobi hyung's talking about Jungkook's friends that he's lost, Namjoon." Taehyung says with a small sigh.

"I thought he only lost one though?" I question, not fully understanding.

"Technically, he lost two. Jungkook was extremely close to his old roommate. The room your currently staying in belonged to him. Kookie and Jimin were closer than anybody we'd ever seen. Jimin was the older brother that Jungkook never had and always needed. He was the first one to actually celebrate Jungkook's birthday.

"However, Jimin became really close with someone else. Granted, Jimin was also getting close to a girl they went to school with. Well,... when Jimin became close with this new guy, anyone Jimin was close with, Jungkook would also become close with. It's how we all actually became friends. Anyways, the problem was that this new guy developed feelings for Jimin.

"The shitty thing, was that Jimin had feelings for this guy too. But, he felt like he couldn't do anything about it because of how hard his father had instilled the teachings of the church into him. Jimin felt it was wrong because of that, so he ended up dating the girl even though he didn't feel the same as her. But... one day the girl got into a really bad car crash." Hoseok pauses, taking a deep breath.

The car crash. Jungkook said he knew how damaging it could be to be stuck in a hospital, just not first hand...

"She ended up in critical condition because of the accident. Jimin went to visit her when he could outside of school and work, and would also visit his friends as often as possible too. After a month though, the girls family pulled her off life support and allowed her to die. The new guy took the opportunity, begging Jimin to just give him a chance since they'd talked about their feelings beforehand at one point. It... it was too much for him though..." Taehyung continues for Hoseok before having to take a second himself. Hoseok teaches over and puts a hand on his shoulder.

"I think the two of them went back and forth on the topic for a few months. Jimin would still hang out with him, and Jungkook would most times be with them. However, at some point, I guess the guy developed a drinking problem... he'd been drinking his sorrows away in the evening because of how hard it was not to be able to be with Jimin when it was the only thing he'd wanted. And he'd often times vent to Jungkook about it when he'd have the chance.

"At one point though, I think it was maybe four or five months after the girl had passed and the drinking had started, Jungkook finally sent him to the doctors to make sure he wasn't doing any permanent damage to his body like Jungkook was worried about. All three of them went but,... the guy developed cancer because of his drinking.

"Jimin knew firsthand what cancer does to people... Not even a week later, he killed himself because he couldn't handle it. He didn't want to see the one person he cared most about lose his life because of this and he couldn't stand the fact that he'd been the reason he'd started drinking in the first place." Hoseok explains.

"What I'd said earlier, Namjoon... Jungkook was the one who found Jimin. He'd locked himself in the bathroom that night and by the time Jungkook got inside,... Kookie couldn't get him to the hospital in time. He lost the two people he'd became closest with." Taehyung says softly.

"Jin hyung, Tae, and I have been keeping an eye on him ever since he lost Jimin. Until tonight, it was the last time any of us had seen him cry. We don't think he's really dealt with any of the emotions. I don't think he's really properly grieved either of their losses. He bottles all of his emotions and thoughts up and...

"I don't know how he manages to put on the show that his life is perfect. You have to understand that what happened tonight, isn't your fault, Namjoon. It's been bound to happen. It's been three years. The only reason this happened was because you kissing him stirred up and somehow unleashed too much mentally for him. He does better when he has someone and he's not let anyone in since Jimin's death. Jungkook really does like you though, and he really does care for you though. You need to know and understand that." Hoseok informs me gently.

"What... What was the name of the guy who liked the Jimin kid?" I ask hesitantly, afraid of what I'm about to hear.

"Yoongi. Why?"