The Queen's Thief

Chapter 11: Drunken tears

*26 years old*
*Story Brooke*
~Samantha's pov~

Its been a couple days since Emma and I found my paintings missing and I have been cooped up inside my apartment after buying a couple cases of beer and I decided to go for a walk and get some fresh air, but then something happened that made me wish I never left. 

I  was walking past Regina's house and I over heard a conversation.

"Do you love him?"

I don't know why exactly Emma was asking her that but I felt as though I needed to hear the answer.

"Of course I love him." My heart sank into my stomach as I heard her heals hit the ground as she walked inside and closed the door.

I noticed neither of them had seen me there in the first place, so I could just leave and they wouldn't know I heard anything. Especially Emma since she knows how I feel for Regina.

It was winter break and I was on vacation from the bar, yet I found myself at there.

I couldn't tell you how much I had to drink or what happened exactly in the restroom with Ruby. Probably the usual, just none of her pillow talk.

I eventually was cut off, so I paid my tab and began to roam the empty streets of this small town.

"Sam?" I turned around to see the gorgeous blonde herself standing next to her yellow car. "Are you ok?"

"Why are you here Emma?" I slurred out as I yelled. Seeing her just reminded me more of the situation from earlier and the missing paintings.

"Well I do work as a deputy now, and I got a call from people complaining about some drunk girl yelling and being loud." She said as she walked closer to me.

"Does it look like anyone here is drunk?" I asked as I waved my hand around like there were other people around.

"Hey why don't we go for a ride and we can talk about this." She held her hand out to me with her palm facing the sky.

I don't remember agreeing going with her but I remember her guiding me to a chair at the station as I began to slightly (not much) sober up.

"So what is wrong?" She handed me a mug with some hot black liquid in it.

"Coffee?" I asked as I squinted at my tiny reflection in the liquid.

"I know you like coffee. Plus it should help sober you up." She sat down behind the desk and leaned back in her chair. "Are you going to tell me why you were upset enough to drink until you can't think straight? No one drinks to get drunk for no reason."

"Hun. I've never thought straight in my life." I joked around a bit while I took a drink.

"Stop avoiding the question." She was getting irritated and it pissed me off. She wants to get angry at me when I'm the one who's hurt.

"Why don't I ask you questions?"

"I asked you first."

"Why did you put Henry up for adoption? Why did you choose to stay? Why do..." I probably crossed the line.

"JUST ANSWER THE DAMN QUESTION! Stop turning your pain toward me I'm trying to help you." She started off shouting but quickly lowered her voice once she realized she had lost her temper. "That what friends do they help eachother."

"Maybe I don't want help." She didn't say anything this time. "Maybe I deserve all the pain I receive, cause sex and alcohol can't keep it away. Maybe I'm just meant to live with this pain. Maybe it will pass, but until then let her love whoever she wants, and let me wake up in whatever ditch I make it to." I quickly chugged the burning black liquid causing me to burn my tongue before I stood up. "I never asked for help Emma. I don't expect any kindness. I just want to find my peace some how."

She remained silent like she knew exactly what I was feeling.

I placed the mug on the desk before I walked to the door.

"Thank you for the coffee."

I was originally planning on walking back to my empty apartment, but I couldn't stand to be alone with all the new unfinished paintings right now.

I ended up walking for hours and eventually I found myself at Broken Cliff.

I'd be lying if I said I never thought of jumping off of the cliff before, I've even dreamt of it, but I always find myself just sitting here surrounded with the sound of the waves crashing against the rocks down below while I dangle my legs over the edge.

"You know you don't have to worry about me jumping. I'm not brave enough." I said to the person who was standing behind me.

"Dearie you know it's easy to die. It's harder to keep living."

"Mr Gold, why do you always show up when I'm here?" I asked as my brain asked a thousand other things to itself.

"Because the broken cliff is where things that are broken go, or people who think they are, dearie."

"I don't think I'm broken I know I am. I've been broken for years. I just don't have the guts to fall." I know he sat down on a rock a few feet away from me but he said nothing.

Normally he would've said something to piss me off already and I would've left him here alone and gone to sleep in my bed.

"Why are you so quiet?" I couldn't help but ask him finally.

"This is where you lost your first love to a man, you where here when your brother died and you came every night your father drank." He looked at the sea like he had lost something out there.  "Now you're here and you've been drinking."

"She's still my only love. And she's never actually said she loved anyone before. Not until now. Today Emma asked if 'she loved him' and Regina said she did."

"Are you sure they weren't talking about her son?"

"How could I be so stupid? Of course they could've been talking about Henry. I forget Emma is his biological mother." I said as I hit my forehead with my palm. "Thank you Mr Gold."

"You're quite welcome Sam."

I looked back and saw him walking away. I looked out into the distance and I got new inspiration for a painting, but first I have to apologize to Emma. 

I looked around to find her but then I figured she must be at home asleep by now so I should probably wait until tomorrow.