and i fall

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And I fall again.

I no longer remember
how to stand properly,
even after promising myself
I would rise every time.

Because I am caged
by the ungiving strings of my heart.

I keep blaming love for it,
calling it cruel,
calling it a monster,
as if it were the thing
holding me captive.

But the truth is far worse.

The door was never locked.

I was the one
who stayed sitting on the floor,
waiting for a key.

Searching desperately
for something to open
a lock that never existed.

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