Let's Pretend We're Numb

Ch. 1

Jasmine

I lay on my pillow, mouth slacked and eyes closed. I feel so much peace and serenity, nothing can ruin how amazingly peaceful I feel right now.

"Mommy! Mommy! It's Saturday, wake up!" He cheers and I groaned as I rolled over.

Okay, so I spoke too soon.

No one can ruin my peace except for my four year old son, Jaiden. I stare at him as he sits on my legs. His big brown eyes melt into mines and his and his curls hang all over. I sighed and stroked his hair.

"Yes Jai, I am aware that it's Saturday." I closed my eyes for a second then shoot them back open. I jump up grasping Jaiden and run across the hall to his room.

Oh shit! Jahseh's gonna have a bitch fit!

I rummage through Jaiden's clothes and pull out a black shirt that says "Bad" written across the middle and some jean shorts. Jahseh bought him the shirt from his clothing line. I throw them on his bed and run with Jaiden tucked under my arm like a football, while he laughs. I get in the bathroom and sit him on the sink.

"Okay Jai. Quick wash up!" He takes off his night clothes and stands up on the counter like an 'X'. I was under his neck, armpits and between the legs. I snatch him up running back to his room and look over at the clock.

9:55. Fuck!

I throw Jaiden's clothes at him and he knows to start getting dressed. I make his bag for the weekend and groaned to myself. I definitely should've did this shit last night. I shake my head and cuss out loud when the doorbell rings. Jaiden giggled.

"Oooo Mommy, you said a bad word!" He laughs and I growl and grit my teeth.

"Oh hush child!" I finish throwing his stuff that he needs in the bag then scoop him up. The doorbell rings again and I rolled my eyes.

Yeah, yeah, I'm coming!

I throw Jaiden on my hip and throw his bag on my free shoulder. I trudge down the stairs and throw the front door open. Jahseh is standing there with his blue dreads braided in two, as his dark eyes stare at me in annoyance. He wears a black Bad Vibes hoodie, Hollister cargo pants and black Nike air forces. His eyes pierce mines as Jaiden cheers and reached out to him.

"DADDY!" Jahseh grins and takes him from me. I hand him Jaiden's bag and he sets him down.

"Go get in the car lil man, I'll be there to buckle you in." Jaiden runs off on his little feet to Jahseh's black BMW i8 and crawl in the backseat as the driver side door is already up and opened for him to get in. I watch him until he gets in and Jahseh clears his throat. I looked up at him and he's frowning.

"Really Jasmine? Late again?" He asked rolling his eyes. I sigh and shrug.

"My bad, I woke up late. It's not a big deal." He tilts his head and scoffs.

"Whatever, bro. I hope yo' ass wasn't out partying last night." He spats. My eyes widen and anger builds inside me.

"Since when do I have the fucking time to party, Jah? Besides, that's your job, and you're good at it too. That's how we met, remember?" I rolled my eyes. His brown eyes darkened and he speaks lowly.

"I don't got time for you and your shit today, Jasmine. I'm just saying."

I crossed my arms. "Yeah, whatever. Just don't forget that partying got us here." I use my hand and draw a circle in the air.

"Also it's how it got us that little boy over there." I point to Jahseh's car and Jaiden's sitting in his car seat, bopping his head to the music that's playing in Jahseh's car. Jahseh shakes his head and laughs.

"Best thing I've ever gotten from you." I pout my lips and look at him, feigning hurt.

"Ouch. That was cold. Almost as cold as your heart." He grins and rolled his eyes.

"Bye Jas." I lean against the door and watch Jah reach in the back to strap Jaiden in. He gets in the driver's seat and his car door goes down. He starts his car letting down the windows and he looks out his with an irritated look.

"Jai, say bye to Mommy." Jaiden smiled making his dimples pop and waved out the window.

"Bye Mommy! See you Monday!" He shouts. I waved back and smiled.

"Bye baby!"

I wave until the car disappears in the distance and I go back inside and closed the door. I rub my face. Damn Jahseh really gets on my nerves. He's so fucking arrogant and cocky. And listen to me talking about the guy I have a son with.

I mean, at least he's still around and helps out, but still, he's just so... ugh!

How did I ever get in this situation with him? Maybe because he was a attractive ass player and I was a dumb horny bitch. I laugh out loud to myself and plop onto the couch. My house is quiet without Jaiden here. I frown and sigh deeply letting my eyelids droop. I just had to sleep with the bad boy of the school. Yeah, he was a bad boy alright. Knocking me up at 17 years old. Soon, I drift off in a peaceful sleep.

~•~

Jahseh

I sit in a booth at Chuck-E-Cheese and watch Jaiden play a car riding game. I sit back in the booth and let out a sigh.

"Jasmine's fucking killing me, bro." I groan and rub my face as I sit across from my vro who's known as my best friend, Stokeley. He shakes his head and laugh.

"Vro, I think you find reasons to get mad at shorty." He shrugs. I snap my head up at him and throw him a 'what the fuck' look. He laughs.

"You're always complaining about her. I don't think she's as bad of a mom as you try to make her sound." I shake my head and put up a finger.

"Hold on, hold on. I never said anything about Jasmine being a bad mom to my son."

Stokeley shrugs. "Shit, you make it seem that way. Y'all need to stop all of this hate towards each other and try to get along for Jai." He says seriously. I looked over to see Jaiden hugging a little girl and giving her a token. I watch him as Stoke continues.

"Cause if not, Jai is gonna start to realize that his momma and daddy aren't happy and then he'll think the only reason why is him. Don't fuck up his life with that childish shit, Jah. You're my vrother forever, but you can be on that fuck shit. I can tell you having a baby with shorty was the smartest shit ever." I snap my head back towards Stokeley and he's laughing.

I frowned. "So you're telling me bro that fucking shorty and giving her the dagger dick and getting her pregnant at 17 was smart?"

He nods with a smirk. "Yup! Shorty has you reeled in for life now, but I think she can change your fucked up ways." I shake my head and rolled my eyes. Jasmine can't change me. I looked over at Jai again and he lets another little girl cut in front of him into the tunnel. I grinned.

She can't change me, but my son can. Maybe I can work something out with Jasmine... just maybe.