Ditto || l.p

Ch.35- flu?

Scrolling through the endless tweets about Liam and myself, I realized that I needed to learn how to do what I was told. It was the same thing over and over again, saying I was ugly or fat, but each tweet upset me a little more than the last.

I know Liam told me to stay off of it, and I really did try to. But it was almost like being addicted to drugs. Once you start, you can't stop. Or you can't go very long without it.

I needed to know. I needed to see what it was about me that they hated so much, and then fix it. I just wanted to make them happy, so they didn't hate Liam for dating the fat, ugly chick.

Right now was the perfect time to do it, because all of the lads were at an interview and wouldn't be back for a couple hours.

So I sat at the end of the sofa, curled into a ball hugging a pillow, and scrolled, letting the words sink into my brain and slowly begin to affect me.

I tried holding my tears back, just because I was tired of crying over every little thing. I went to Liam's account, knowing he had posted a photo of us together and scrolled through those comments.

I smiled slightly at the first ones. They were saying how cute Liam and I were and one actually said I was pretty. But just below it, was one telling me they wanted me dead.

My heart dropped. Being told I'm fat was one thing, but a death threat wasn't anything I anticipated or prepared myself for. I slowly put my phone down, my hands shaking.

I stood up from the sofa and slowly walked into the bathroom. I put the toilet lid down and sat on it, putting my head in my hands. There's people that want me dead, just because I'm dating Liam.

My whole body shook. My mind was a mess; do I do something about it? Do I tell Liam or keep my mouth shut? Should I kill myself to make them happy?

No. I stopped my thoughts there. This isn't good, this isn't what I'm supposed to be focusing on. It's supposed to be about Liam and I as a team, not whether someone accepts us or not.

I felt like throwing up. I thought about the lunch I had eaten a few hours before, and how badly I wished I hadn't. I shouldn't have eaten it, I clearly don't need it.

I heard the hotel room door open and I quickly composed myself before stepping out. "Hi, the interviews didn't take as long as I thought they would," Liam said and gave me a quick kiss. "What have you been doing?"

"N-nothing," I shrugged, just as Niall walked into the room.

"Honey, I'm home!" he joked and playfully punched my arm. I forced a laugh and playfully pushed him back.

"So, guess what," Liam said as he kicked his shoes off and threw his coat over the back of a chair.

"What?" I asked quietly, biting my nails nervously. It's okay, this is good. They're distracting me.

"We all got invited to a party tonight. Girlfriends included," he smiled and poked my side, causing me to flinch.

"Don't touch me," I giggled slightly and pushed his arm away. He gave me an evil grin, then before I had time to process what was going on, he was straddling me on the bed and holding my arms down above my head.

"Niall!" he called over his shoulder and Niall was there in a split second.

"Yes?"

"No-no Liam, please don't," I begged, struggling under his grasp but he was far to strong for me.

"Okay, I won't," he grinned. I let out a sigh of relief, then quickly sucked it back in when he said, "Niall will."

I opened my mouth to protest just as Niall began jabbing my ribs with his fingers. I didn't know if laughing or crying was the better option, so I went with both.