Lumière // h.s

[ t w e l v e ]

Cait's POV

Although I'd been trying to ignore Harry as much as possible his daily texts were wearing me thin. In 1 week the boys are setting off on tour. I've agreed to go for 2 weeks and then I'll decide whether I want to stay or go home.

I'm kind of speaking with my mum again, our relationships strained and awkward but I can't not speak to my mum.

Harry: Right now, I only want to speak with you, let's have dinner? ill pick you up at 6?

Me: okay

I gave in. Damn it.

- - - - - -

At exactly 18:02 there was a ring on the doorbell. I answered with a small smile.

"You look nice." He complimented as always.

I hadn't really tried; skinny jeans, cute yellow shirt with white polka dots, white sandals and a little clutch.

"Thank you."

We arrived at the restaurant and were immediately seated. I felt awkward as people were staring and whispering and trying to work who I was and why I was with Harry.

"Have you started packing?" Harry asks sipping his water as we awaited our food - he ordered steak, I ordered pasta.

"Some things, not a lot yet."

"Brazils hot."

I smile. "I know."

We sit in silence again, this time not so awkward.

"When is Leah joining tour?" I didn't really care but I felt obligated to ask.

Harry shrugs. "I don't know if she is. We're not really a thing."

I nod. "Do you like her?"

"She's nice."

"But do you like her?" I ask again.

"She's fun to be with, I enjoy spending time with her."

No, you enjoy the sex.

"Well that's important." I smile eating some pasta.

"Have you met any guys here in London yet?"

I laugh. "I don't go out to meet anyone."

"You could meet someone tour."

"Doubt it."

- - - - -

After dinner, harry invited me back to his.

"It's a bit messy, I'm sorry." He laughs.

"I live with Louis, it could never be as messy as his room."

We both laugh sitting on his sofa, he puts on a random tv show as he pours us some wine.

"Is there any wine that you like in particular?"

I shrug. "I don't feel mature enough to have a favourite wine yet."

We both smile.

"Look Cait, I know these past couple of weeks have been up and down for us but I want you to know you mean a lot to me and I don't want you to shut me out or ignore me when something goes wrong or if I do something or say something you don't like. I want you to talk to me, trust me."

I swallow, the mood in here changed quickly.

"Okay."

"You don't trust me do you?"

I avoid his eyes.

"I don't trust anyone."

He let's out a breath.

"Even my twin brother turns and uses things close to me against me, how can I trust anyone?"

"What did he say?"

I shake my head.

"I'm.. not like everyone else. I don't function the same way. I don't see things the same way you do." I say softly. "I don't trust easily, I get nervous when I meet new people, so nervous I've thrown up before because I get so scared. I hate eating in public and just the thought of speaking in front of more than 3 people makes me want to faint."

He looked as if he was working something out.

"I don't like train stations, or asking strangers for directions and I hate flying hence why I'm dreading going on tour with you."

"Let me help you through it. What ever you need you - tell me."

I shake my head. "I can't rely on you. You can't make me better. Plus, you have Leah now." I smile a little.

"She isn't.. she.." He doesn't finish his sentence.

I look down as harry brushes my hair behind my ear, he's all of a sudden sitting so close, my breathing constricts as he leans in. He kisses my lips slowly before I pull back shocked at what just happened.

Harry just kissed me.

Before either of us can speak Harry's doorbell rings. He stands to answer as I stand and grab my bag.

"Hey babe!" Leah bursts in kissing him right on the lips. The ones I've just kissed. "I've brought Chinese for us."

"I've already eaten." He replies eyes on me still.

I stand awkwardly.

"Hey Cait!" She smiles hugging me.

I pull back and look away from Harry who is kind of in shock.

"Erm just put the food in the kitchen babe."

Is he serious?

"Okay!" She calls already on her way there.

"You don't have to go.." He starts.

"No, it's okay." I shuffle awkwardly.

"Cait you can join us for food?" Leah smiles taking off her shoes.

I head for the door. "No I'll leave you both to it, I really only came over to see if Louis was here." I lie. "See you soon." I smile at her before walking past Harry who is biting his lip.

I walk out and call for a taxi seeing as I don't really feel like speaking to Louis just yet.

Harry: I'm sorry x