Lumière // h.s

[ f o r t y ]

A/N: Chapter 40 guys! Who knew I'd get up to 40 chapters?! Lots to come :)

(I don't know when this book will finish chapter 98? Haha)

x x

Cait's POV.

I finished applying lipstick, carefully blotting it making sure it was perfect before throwing the blotting tissue away and placing my lipstick in my clutch so I can top up later.

I shut the clasp of my clutch when Harry knocked on my door. We hadn't spoken. Not once. Not since my realisation - I was too hurt to speak and he was too ashamed to even think of a conversation starter.

"Car's here."

I nod silently turning on my lamp so it was on for when I came home later.

I follow Harry downstairs and out the door, I walk to the car as he locks up.

"Evening." The driver greets as I sit inside.

"Evening." I smile politely.

When Harry sits beside me I'm silent staring out at the London night life. We're silent the entire car journey. I occasionally open and close my clutch whilst Harry spent the car journey typing frantically.

Must be someone important. My mind laughs bitterly.

Maybe it's her. I cringe physically looking out of the window. What would he text her? Does he say the things he says to me to her?

When we arrive the paparazzi were ready and waiting with their cameras and questions. Harry was out first and I followed - my head down most of the time.

Once inside we found Gemma who was on her phone oblivious to our arrival. We sat across from her and she instantly looked up a huge smile across her face. "Hey!"

We smiled and greeted her, Harry taking over the conversation asking her about life in London and if she'd spoken to their mum recently.

"So how is the model life?" Gemma winked. I had told her over the phone, knowing she'd be supportive and not leak it to people. Gemma like Harry was someone you knew you could instantly trust.

"Um," I laugh awkwardly stirring my water with my straw. "Different."

"I'm so excited for what is to come for you."

I smile. "Thank you, I have meetings on monday. I have no idea what for or who with but I do know I have to be up super early." I roll my eyes.

Gemma smiles excitedly not noticing the bitter tension between Harry and myself. Whenever he spoke i'd distract myself and whenever I spoke he'd check his phone or look through the dessert menu.

When Harry excused himself to go to the toilet Gemma placed her fork down looking at me questioningly. "What's going on between you two?" So she had noticed.

"Um, nothing. Why?"

"Liar. You haven't looked at each other once. Or even spoken to each other."

I swallow. "We had a fight."

"First lovers tiff?" She smirks.

"He gave Leah a ride to her hotel the other night after she went to his show."

Gemma's smile drops. "Oh."

"He promised nothing happened. And I want to believe him but, he hasn't even ended things between him and Leah. He just stopped talking with her. Or at least I think so. But now I'm not so sure, I mean if you hadn't spoken to someone for a long time - someone you were with - and then went to their show and got a ride home would you be okay with that? Wouldn't you expect something from them?"

Gemma sighed. "My brother is an idiot."

"I just thought he respected me more than that."

"He does, he likes you a lot Cait."

I give her a sad smile. "As soon as I start getting money in I'm going to look for a place."

"What will that do to you two?"

I shrug, "We will have to see, won't we?"

- - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Arriving home, I took my shoes off and headed for the kitchen. Surprisingly Harry followed me. I put the kettle on and got myself a mug out, Harry stood against the counter not too close to me.

I took my hair out wrapping my hair tie around my wrist as the kettle boiled.

"Shall we talk?" Harry asked as I poured the water into my mug.

He watched me bob the teabag up and down before throwing it away.

"I don't know what I can say right now."

I stir in some sugar and sip it testing there was enough.

"Nothing happened between Leah and I that night."

I lean against the counter holding my tea up to my face as I slowly sip it.

"I'm kind of over that. It's more the fact that you never ended it with her that I'm bothered about." I snap.

"I just.. forgot."

"Forgot what? To tell someone you've been sleeping with that it was over because you have a girlfriend? Or were you hoping to continue to sleep with her?"

"No, no. I don't want to sleep with Leah. I have you."

"Come on Harry, you aren't getting it from me, I'm sure you text her the second you landed." I scoffed.

"You honestly think I'd degrade you like that? Throw us away for a shag?"

"I don't really know what I think anymore."

"Wow." He looks as if he'd been winded, taken a heavy blow to his heart.

"Has she text you since?" I whisper.

"Cait-"

"Has she?" I interrupt annoyed with his hesitance.

"Yes."

"And?"

"It's not important Cait what's important is that-"

"It's fucking important to me alright!" I shout stunning us both. I never shout and I never swear.

"She wanted me to visit her," He says quietly. "She's in London - off work for a bit. She invited me to her place."

"And you said yes I'm guessing?" I tip my now cold tea away, I'd gone off of the idea of digesting anything.

"Only so I could explain how I now have a girlfriend."

"Can't do that over text? Phone call? Or were you hoping you could actually shag her one last time? Her intentions aren't innocent I mean - she still thinks your fuck buddies." I say with so much hatred in my voice I was surprised myself.

"I-"

"I thought I could trust you Harry. I came to you when I had no one, and now I don't have you, I'm alone." I throw my hands up. "I can't bear to even be near you right now."

"Cait-"

"Goodbye Harry." I reply grabbing my bag and slamming the door behind me. I just need a walk, some air, and some space. Even if it is 11pm at night.