Every story has a voice.
Every story has a message.
But it's useless if no one can hear it.
How does it feel to pour your heart and soul into a story you love, only to find it being ignored? To spend every waking moment watching your story get swe...
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Title (3/5): "Bet on IT!" is a well-fitting title to the plot and summary. It's a clever way to attract intrigue from readers by capitalizing "IT" - despite not being a fan of capitalized titles, this works in your favor as it highlights the significance of the bet as the main plot of your story. I deducted a few points because I felt like the title was rather simplistic when it could have been developed more to sound interesting without explicitly referring to the bet to add a sense of mystery to it.
Summary (7/10): Your summary has a generous amount of the general plot described without spoiling too much despite being made of only 3 sentences, which is impressive, given that you were able to deliver a decent overview of the plot that does build reader's curiosity. The use of a question is an excellent addition to invoke further intrigue towards your story. However, I felt that it could have been developed more creatively, possibly using metaphors or the like to spice the summary up.
Plot (21/25): The concept of "love blossoming from a bet" is no stranger in fanfiction. It all comes down to the effort placed to make it unique as its own. Your plot was simple and well-written, with a steady amount of pacing and events that weren't too far apart within a single one-shot, however the plot could be further developed into a longer story to explore more in-depth characterization and scenes. An odd event in the plot that I found peculiar was how quick the table turned when after Atsuya offered Ohiyoko the umbrella to the scene where Ohiyoko's brother is rushed to the hospital. This scene in particular seemed very rushed, when such a change in behavior and emotions could be portrayed throughout a longer period of time in the story. A personal favorite of mine is the ending of the story. While many fics with the same plot concept would leave the bet unfinished, having Ohiyoko take no offense to being betted on and instead used it in her favour towards Atsuya is brilliant.
Characterization (20/20): I will begin to comment on Fubuki Atsuya's characterization. I really enjoyed how you presented Atsuya's character. He is the perfect amount of mischievous and confident that is still entertaining to read - many fics tend to exaggerate his confidence to the point he is painted as a jerk, but yours was just enough to keep Atsuya loveable to readers. I believe Atsuya to have a very dynamic character and you managed to write him as such. Ohiyoko's characterization was well-presented as well. Her seriousness and strictness was fun to read in contrast to Atsuya's cheekiness, and her playful mannerism nearing the end was enough to keep her character likeable without suddenly being invested in Atsuya for no reason. The interactions between both characters were very entertaining to read and never once boring!
Grammar and Writing Style (14/15): You have excellent grammar that is consistent and well-presented with the plot which makes it really easy to read. Not much for me to comment on this section, however, there are a few minor mistakes that can be quickly fixed, such as "in compare" should be "in comparison," and "too considered" should be "too considerate." Overall, your writing style is simple yet capable of good delivery of the plot.
Originality (6/10): In terms of originality, the idea of romance blooming from what was initially a bet is a cliché trope found throughout many fics across many fandoms. There have been many interpretations of the trope and it takes lots of creativity to be able to take the concept and make it unique on their own. The originality points I have given you are to appreciate your excellent attempt to take this trope and apply it to Inazuma Eleven, especially with a feisty character like Fubuki Atsuya. Despite having the typical trope of having the male bet on getting the female character to fall for him, I especially would like to applaud you for creating a surprising end to your story! Instead of making the second character angry or spiteful knowing that they were the subject of a bet, you made them aware of it beforehand and instead jump into the bandwagon of "making a bet". I find this part of your story very intriguing and fun to read, knowing that their rivalry will not die down by a blooming romance which really adds more energy to their dynamic.
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