jack gilinsky imagines

imagine

listen to imagine by ariana grande to kind of set the mood for this :)

i lay in my bed, wondering if the tears would finally stop coming. i close my eyes, incapable of crying anymore but still capable of being able to feel my heart breaking.

my mind wandered to a hundred different things, a hundred different memories. the good, the bad. everything.

it was as if a movie had started playing in my head, and there was no way for me to turn it off.

i saw as different scenes played.

the day i met him. jack gilinsky.
he was always so shy but intimidating when he met new people. we met because of mutual friends, me knowing jack johnson who happened to be his bestest friend of all time. he simply shook my hand, asked for my name, and turned back to drinking something out of his red cup. i didn't like him at first, thinking he was the most stuck up bitch ever.

the movie playing inside my head showed me the next scene the day i found out that i liked him.
nothing broke me more than thinking about jack gilinsky. i has fallen for him, hard. we started talking more and more because our friends would start hanging out more and more. we started talking and i found out he really isn't as stuck up as he seemed at first. i learned so much about his life. how he has 2 older sisters, how he considers johnson to be the most important person in his life (following after his family obviously). he also admitted that he didn't want to come off as rude when we first met, it was only because he had put a "wall" up around him, not wanting to get hurt or too attached to anyone after what had happened with his ex girlfriend. i wish i hadn't asked exactly what she did. he snapped back at me, saying "nothing". a guarded look came over his eyes, and i decided that was enough questioning.

but, over time, he came around. he started opening up to me, telling me things he swore he hadn't told any of his friends besides johnson. how his ex girlfriend had verbally abused him or how his depression would talk control of his mind and tell him he wasn't worth shit. he cried that night, talking about how broken and shattered he was when he found out his ex was cheating on him. as he fell asleep in my lap, his tears still drying, i promised to myself that i'd never hurt him the she had. and with that promise came a realization; i had fallen for the curly haired boy named jack gilinsky.

at first i had thought that he wouldn't like me back, because i wasn't exactly what you would call his type. but, as time went on and we got even closer, my mind had changed. i had begun to think he maybe would feel the same way. he had gotten so flirty, and so close to me in a span of a couple of months. so i built up the courage to tell him, thinking he would scoop me up in his arms and kiss me.

i was wrong.

my mind skipped to the next scene. the one that hurt the most. the one that had gotten me to cry all my tears and yell till my throat was sore.

we, meaning gilinsky and i's friends, had decided to meet up at the nearest in n out and have lunch. i had planned everything out. i was gonna ask gilinsky if he could come over and tell him. as simple as that.

as we were waiting, i looked towards the door and felt my heart shatter. gilinsky was there in all his glory. my eyes landed on the girl who's hand he was holding. i tried thinking back to the descriptions of the girls in jack's life that he had given me. she didn't look to be one of his sisters and then it hit me. madison. his ex. the one he oh so desperately claimed to hate.

he walked over to us, beaming. "hey guys!" he said. he turned to me and smiled even harder. oh how that broke my heart. a couple of minutes ago, had he smiled at me like that, i would've jumped into his arms, telling him everything. "hey y/n! this is my girlfriend, madison." he says. although i had figured out who he was, i was hoping that i'd be wrong. they sat down next to me and as the day went on, i wanted to do nothing more than cry. i asked gilinsky to come home with me still, not being able to hold it in anymore.

he told madison he needed to help me do something. as we got to my house and walked in, i did something i wish i hadn't. i connected my lips with gilinsky's, hoping that if i kissed him hard enough, he'd feel the same way about me. as i connected my lips with him, i felt everything still. the world stopped. the sparks were there, the butterflies in my stomach wouldn't go away. i couldn't be the only one to feel that, right?

he stayed still, his lips not moving. he started kissing back, but, after realizing who was kissing him, he pulled away.

"y/n" he says, out of breath and in disbelief.

so i tell him. everything. from how much i love him, to wanting nothing than to wake up everyday to him by my side.

"you said she hurt you jack. why are you with her? she doesn't treat you the way you deserve to be treated."

"who would treat me the right way then y/n? no one in the world gets me as much as she does."

"i would. don't you get it. i'm so head over heels for you. imagine a world where we would be together. we'd be so happy. why can't you imagine a world like that?" i say, begging him to stay with me.

he doesn't say anything. just leaves.

and here i am now. on my bed, crying. i should've known he'd never stay. he's so....perfect. why would he settle for me when he can have madison, who singlehandedly can outdo me in every way possible.

i almost fall asleep, thinking about jack when i hear a knock on my front door.

i stumble down the stairs to the door. i fix my hair, not wanting whoever it is to see me looking like this.

i swing open the door and my jaw drops.

his eyes are beat red and puffy. he looks like he's been..... crying. but why would he be crying?

"jack" i say almost inaudible.

this imagine is so long already so if anyone wants a part two, let me know. or we can always leave it off on a cliffhanger :)