Sweet Surrender

Sweet Surrender: 29

Hailey

IT HAD been so much easier to hate him than to love him like she did.

Walang sawa ang tulo ng luha ko habang nakatanaw sa papalayong likuran ni Aldous. Dama ko ang sakit, ang pang hihinayaang. Akala ko, matapos ang kaguluhan sa pagitan ng mga pamilya namin maayos na ang lahat. Akala ko, matapos kong mapatunayan na hindi si Papa ang may kasalanan sa pagkamatay ng tiyahin niya malilinis ko na ang nadungisang pangalan ng pamilya ko.

Hindi rin pala.

Dahil sa pamilya ko rin nag ugat ang lahat ng mga kasalanan ng nakaraan. Si Auntie Aurora, si Uncle Lawrence. Si kuya Harvey. Papaano ba maitatama ang lahat ng mali?

I found a guy, told me I was a star
He held the door, held my hand in the dark
And he's perfect on paper, but he's lying to my face
Does he think that I'm the kind of girl who needs to be saved?
And there's one more boy, he's from my past
We fell in love, but it didn't last
'Cause the second I figure it out, he pushes me away
And I won't fight for love if you won't meet me half-way
'Cause I say that I'm through, but this song's still for you

"Bakit basta ka na lang sumuko? Hindi mo susundan?" nag paling ako ng tingin at ng makita ko si Vince na may malaking pagkakahawig kay Aldous ay lalo lang akong nalungkot.

"Ito naman talaga ang dapat na mangyari sa simula pa lang." kibit balikat kong sagot para lang mapag takpan ang kirot sa puso ko. Parang babaliktad ang sikmura ko sa katotohanang hindi ko kayang ibalik ang lahat sa dati. Oo, alam na namin ang totoong salarin pero hindi iyon sapat.

"Pareho kayong matigas ng kapatid ko." naiiling na sagot ni Vince na nginisian ng ng mapait. Nag umpisa na akong lumakad papalayo kasi ramdam ko yung awa ni vince para sa akin na ayokong tanggapin. This will not define me. This will not be the end of my story. My mission has finished but my healing begins. Makakapag simula na ako ng malaya sa lahat ng guilt na inipon ko ng maraming taon.

Makakapag simula na ako, malayo sa mga Saavedra...

❤️❤️📖❤️❤️

MOST little girls dream of their man of their dreams, their wedding day. I was no different growing up. It's funny how your youth blinds you to reality. Maybe if I had been born into a normal family, I'd still be fantasizing about my big day, but I was not. I was born an Asuncion. It didn't take me long to notice that my family was different. My father was a criminal and he died in prison. Since childhood, I put my lifes work proving everyone wrong. I didn't even know the word "childhood" because it was pulled away from me. Even the kids at school stayed away from me. I'd heard their parents whispering not to play with me.

At fourteen, I started attending Papa's hearings. It only pushed me to stay among my own family and the people they brought around. They were all I had. All I knew. It's not my fault that most of my family members aren't good people. I didn't choose this life, and I would never get to.

"Why didn't you tell him how you feel about him?" tanong ni kuya Harold bigla sa akin, "Mahal mo siya, obvious din naman na mahal ka rin niya." patuloy pa nito na parang may kausap sa hangin.

All I want is love that lasts
Is all I want too much to ask?
Is it something wrong with me?
All I want is a good guy
Are my expectations far too high?
Try my best but what can I say?
All I have is myself at the end of the day
Shouldn't that be enough for me?