Do I have to choose? (BTS x Ftm Reader)

Chapter 12

"(Y/n), wake up."

Five more minutes...

"(Y/n), you need to get up!"

My eyes peek open slightly, the bright sun attacking them ruthlessly. My line of sight focuses and drifts over to Daejung who seemed extremely flustered, pleading me to get up with extreme urgency. I knew for a fact it was still morning, so our UNDERNINETEEN filming wasn't for a little longer. "Dae-ah, we don't have to go to the recording until later. Let me sleep," a whine slipped passed my lips as I snuggled deeper into my pillow. "No, this is serious. You're in deep shit, my dude."

"What do you mean?" I was more awake now. As soon as I asked he shook his head, leaving the room. My body sat up reluctantly. I was extremely puzzled. That was until I realized I wasn't wearing my binder. I had gotten used to sharing a room with Daejung but I usually got up before he did so he wouldn't notice anything. Shit. Stumbling out of bed, I hurriedly got changed and made my way to the kitchen in hopes he hadn't seen anything. I wasn't exactly crippled with dysphoria from this incident. For the past week or so Daejung had been voicing is pro LGBT
+ views, and it's made me pretty happy. Naturally I want him to see me as a guy, but I know if he found out that i'm not cis he'd still accept me. Considering we're from such a closed minded country, it's quite relieving. Living in a small space like this makes it hard to hide things sometimes. For example, taking my Testosterone at the dorm is almost impossible. I've already come up with a list of excuses if I ever get caught.  I had high hopes of being fine.

"Daejung! What the hell were you talking about back th-" I was stunned almost instantly. My question fell flat, I couldn't finish it at all. A tall man with a highly unamused smile greeted me with my hyungs. Arms crossed, and brows furrowed he tsked at me. I was extremely baffled and lost in what to say. "Seokjin Sunbae-nim has been here for an hour," Luka shrugged as he sipped his coffee. I gulped as my eyes scan over the clock. 10:03. Shit, shit, shit!  How does a person respond to this kind of situation? I had forgotten to set an alarm for breakfast with Seokjin. How could I explain that? Ah, yes. I completely forgot to set an alarm to meet with you, Hyung. I've only looked up to you for years now and continue to leave a bad impression on you. Because that makes sense. I so screwed up big time. Daejung's word from earlier basically dropped an intense weight on my shoulders now that I understood what he meant. But Seokjin began to laugh, it loud goofy laugh that sounded almost painful.

"(Y/n), you look so cute when you're surprised," was all he could muster between his hearty giggles. Even though he was at the point of wheezing, he still managed to look handsome. The other guys joined his laughter, but he suddenly died down. Completely duality as he shifted back to looking angry. My hyungs still chuckled while making chokes about our senior's reaction. I could only stand there like a deer in headlights. He called me cute, and he just went from a snack to a full course meal in front of my eyes like it was nothing.

Fuck me. He's too attractive.

"Sure, but I think we need to at least go on our date first," Seokjin stepped closer with a smirk plastered to his features. "Wait, what?" My feet start to move back as he came closer. "Wow, (Y/n) I never expected you to be so dirty," Luka cooed from behind the large man that stalked my way. Seok sighed, "The quiet ones are always the pervs." "I thought Seok would be the creeper," Daejung shook his head at me.They all seemed to neglect the grown man cornering me with a big grin like the devil on his face. I didn't understand anything that was happening. My back collided with the kitchen wall, and I hissed in frustration that I couldn't escape. Seokjin's arms loosely draped on my buddy, pulling my body close to his. As he did this I realized what they meant. "I said that out loud, didn't I?"

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The drive was quiet, I was too awkward to speak. We hadn't said much since leaving the dorm, but the atmosphere to me was suffocating. Seokjin would glance at me every once in a while as I curled deeper into a ball of embarrassment. There were no words, but I knew he was making fun of me. I honestly debating selective time mutism as we rode the streets of Seoul. At some point I could feel his hand tug on mine, him simply entwining our fingers. Before I had a chance to protest, he folded his fingers keeping my hand in his grip. My breath caught in my throat looking at our joined hands. It was as if he just aimed to tease me. "Stupid Hyung," is all I could muster as I hid in my hood.