Do I have to choose? (BTS x Ftm Reader)

Chapter 21

Jimin pov

I'm not too sure how many glasses I had, but the drinks were getting to me. It wasn't a formal party, it was more of  a casual mixer really. Grilled meats, and soju accompanied by drunken laughter and congratulations to the company's success. People used to say that we would be nothing, that we weren't talented enough to amount to any dreams we had. Nights like these are just a reminder that everyone who said those awful things were wrong. They'd do anything to drag us down though. Plagiarism accusations, calling us western artists. In the eyes of our own home we weren't much. But there's also a dark side to the love we receive. 'Sorry, I only like BTS,'  seemed to be such a common phrase that it was almost disgusting. The Army, the sasaengs, the clout chasers and haters consumed our lives. We're restless, exhausted, and desperate for a simple break from it all. I don't even have enough time with Jin Hyung before he bares arms for Korea, the homeland that ignores him for god's sake.  Parties like these make me think about all the mess that came along with Bangtan.

Do I regret it? No,  but I have a right to feel bitter.

Our kids have it off easy, to instantly have adoring fans. I want to be happy it's this way for them, but when I was in their shoes I was nothing. Not to mention their fandom sprouted from ours. A forced clout driven popularity they didn't ask for. Sometimes i'm scared they aren't being recognized for their own talent. Tomorrow By Together. Our kids, the ones we have to look out for in this world and I personally won't ever have it any other way. It's just so hard to support them when we are being puppetted all over the map. Not to mention Little Sinners will be taking their baby steps into the life of fame soon too.

It's all too much. I wish them so much luck in this dangerous world.

I swirl my whiskey around for a moment, my thoughts as bitter as the burning liquid before I shoot the glass back. The taste was almost like paper on my tongue. Maybe my tongue was numb to the taste. "I turned down Cube for this, like Cube! But I just couldn't walk the same halls as E'dawn and him not be there." My vision blurs slightly as I look up to the table across from mine. It was occupied by LS and TxT members casually chatting about whatever came to mind. "Hey, Sin m'dude, shut up. We all know you have a Pentagon complex," a small boy basically snorted out before sipping a brightly colored drink. He was cute, but he looked so young. I tried to rack my brain to remember his name, but drew a blank with every dwindling attempt. "No room to talk kid, you went to a fan sign before your BigHit audition JUST to tell V you applied!" Sin as he was called earlier snapped in a mocking tone, causing the high schoolers who couldn't drink with the rest of us to laugh hysterically. I smirk, I should've expected this kid to be an Army. But somehow I was too slow to catch on to that more than probable fact.

 "I wasn't planning on telling them, I was actually there for another reason. It's just... I looked at Jimin, and somehow I just felt I needed to say something but I couldn't hold it. I blurted it out like an idiot to Taehyung, and it was so embarrassing. If it wasn't for the fact we ended up being friends, I probably would be hiding out of fear he'd recognize me."

My brows knit together quickly. I didn't quite understand what he meant when he said looking at me just made him want to mention his audition to us. The conversation seemed to die down as the all wander off for more food or to talk to staff around the party. I figured that was a good cue to stop ease dropping, and leaned my head on Taehyung who had been beside me for a while. "Hyung, you should slow down with the drinking if you don't want to drunk post like last time," his velvety voice called to me while I just hummed in response. My eye lids flutter shut, just enjoying the moment. Dishes and glasses clatter around the room, soft murmurs of voices rung in my ears and an exhaustion washed over smoothly. I could just sleep here, and not worry about things like photo shoots or concerts.

Soft music rings through the air amoungst the other noises. It traps my attention, it being a song I couldn't recognize at all. I wanted to know the name, or at least know who I was listening to. The tempo was lulled, slow and almost hypnotic as the lyrics tell a story. "I want to believe that is not a dream when I look into your melancholy heart..." It was soothing, pulling me further into a day dream as the party continues on without me. But just when I thought I could enjoy this relaxation an angelic voice cuts through the song. As if the vocalist didn't need to music, his heart and soul deemed to just bleed from the lyrics as I listened. He sounded so familiar, but I couldn't recall where I heard such talent.

My eyes open again as the song fades away and uproar of applause echoes through the room of staff and talents. "You guys didn't tell us you were going to play that!" Luka, the Canadian boy from LS was hiding his face while whining like a child. Their whole group actually tried to hide behind each other in embarrassment, the unexpected gesture obviously startled them. "But it's such a good song, I'm shocked," Taehyung called out beside me causing a herd of laughter. "Not to be biased, but (Y/n) sounded fantastic. Good luck keeping the fans off of him," Soobin joked as everyone turned away to enjoy the party once more. People who did hear nodded in agreement, and I watched as they slipped over to the shirt boy from earlier. His hands wouldn't leave his face, his red ears being the only visible feature.

"Hyung, I want to go talk to (N/n), do you mind?" Taehyung's face was so lit up with excitement that I couldn't deny him when he lept from his seat, and ran over to the boy I now know as (Y/n). From there the party died off slowly. People slipping out the door to go home, hailing cabs and spewing nonsense about not wanting to be late for work tomorrow. The rest of Bangtan joined me at the table once they were drained of their own energy like the other party goers. Well, all except Jin, Taehyung, Jeonggu, and Hoseok. They were swarmed like awkward vultures around the boy again like they had been earlier back a the company building. I wasn't sure when they had become such close friends, but I was surprised the genuinly loving skills they all shared when looking at (Y/n) do absolutely anything.

Curiosity got the best of me. My feet seem to just move on their own across the floor towards the little huddle of people beside the bar. No one really noticing my presence until (Y/n) greeted me with a wave. "Riot, we need to go soon if you want to practice more tonight like you planned," Daejung who I had met earlier goanced down at his watch before pulling in his jakcet. The smaller boy nodded quickly as he gathered himself as well. I was baffled to say the least. Practice, on a party night? This is what they should want. A break from the stress of practicing, and being perfect. The rest of their group slithered over silent, and fully prepared to leave.

"You're seriously not taking a break?" Jin was the one to speak up in it, but his focus stayed on only one person in particular. (Y/n)'s face turned almost immediately regretful as he pulled a set of keys from his hoodie pocket. There seemed to just be an unspoken conversation between the two before the younger basically gave in and spoke his mind. "Hyung, I need this to be perfect. Please don't try to stop me, I know you do the same. The entire world knows you stay up singing all hours of the night to sound as amazing as you do." Well, he wasn't wrong. Everyone knew, so it was kind of hypocritical if he tried to stop any of them from practicing some more tonight.

"No, Jin Sunbae-nim might be right. You barely sleep or eat as it is. Let's just go home," Luka shrugged before turning to bow to the rest of us. "It was nice to meet everyone, thank you for today."

I'm known to make some random, and pretty stupid decisions. That I can be a little wild and have reckless ideas. So what came out my mouth after being so silent during this encounter, let's just group it with sll my other stupidity.

"Since two of you have to train anyway, do you want to come home with us?"