He Might Be Bad But He's Mine

Telling him about it

JORDAN

I can't believe he's actually gone. I just wanna be held one more time. One more fond embrace. I'd do anything to have him back.

"JORDAN!" I hear someone screaming and it feels like it's in the back of my mind but I can't quite put my finger on where it's coming from but I know that it's James.

"Where are you?" I ask out loud trying to follow his voice.

I had given up on killing my grandparents now. I wanted to find him.

Where was he coming from?

I wanted him back.

I dropped the knife and ran towards the voice.

"BABY! PLEASE WAKE UP!!!" I heard screaming. It was definitely James but where was he and what did he mean wake up? I am awake?

"PLEASE COME BACK TO ME JAMES!!" I scream starting to cry all over again.

"BABY WAKE UP!!" I hear the screaming continue but it doesn't sound like James anymore it sounds like my grams and gramps.

All of a sudden the entire scenario plays again right in front of my eyes as I continue screaming out to James to come back I bolt up.

I look around and I see James, grams, and gramps standing over me.

"Honey what in the world just happened?" My grams asks me walking over and sitting on the bed next to me holding me in her arms and rubbing my head.

"I don't know." I say in a monotone voice.

"Can I please just talk to James grams?" I ask starting to cry again as I close my eyes and see James lying on the floor helplessly dying.

"Sure, honey" she says kissing my forehead and taking gramps' hand and they walk down the stairs.

Once I hear their footsteps reach the landing of the first floor where their room is I fall into JD's arms and just let the tears fall. My whole body is racking with my sobs.

I just let the tears fall and don't try and stop. I don't think I've ever even cried this hard in my entire life. But then again I love him so much and I literally just watched him die.

"Baby? What happened?" He asks. He sounds really scared and he should be by what I just saw happen. Even though it was just a dream it felt so real.

I want to explain it to him but my mouth can't even begin to try and put the experience into words. I try so hard but I feel like the only thing that will come out of my mouth is sobs. Sobs, sobs, and more sobs. But I can't help it.

How do I tell the man that I love that I just watched him die in my nightmare?

"I can't" I say continuing to cry and cry.

When I try to stop they just keep flooding down my cheeks. I lay in his arms feeling the worst pain of my entire life.

I watched the love of my life die. I can't even bring myself to the words to tell him. I love him more than words can even begin to put together.

God I make no sense. I make no fucking sense. I need to tell him. I have to tell him.

"Baby, we need to talk about what happened." I say to him looking up and continuing to cry.

"Anything you need to talk about babe. I'm here for you. You know that." He says.

"I know babe." I say.

"Okay. Whatever you wanna say or you need to say babe." He says.

"I had a really bad dream." I say starting off the awful story I'm about to tell him.

"It's okay babe. Just tell me J. It's okay it was all just a bad dream." He says.

"Okay... I thought I was asleep in the dream and when I woke up in the dream I heard you screaming. I woke up and ran downstairs to try and follow your screaming and when I got down there I saw my grams and cramps standing over you laughing. You were bleeding. You'd been stabbed and you just kept... you just kept bleeding. I'm so sorry. I should've helped you but I- I couldn't. I'm so sorry James." I tried to explain to him.

"It's okay baby. I'm here. I'm okay. You're okay. And we're okay. Please Jordan babe it's okay. Everything's gonna be fine." James days and holds me against his chest.

"Okay. I'm sorry. I'll try again... when you kept bleeding I couldn't take it anymore so I ran towards my grams and gramps and he tried to stab me. I dodged the knife and I tried to run to you but he plunged the knife right into your heart and all the color drained from your body and you laid there dying and no matter what I couldn't save you. You just laid there. I went to look for my grams and gramps because I was gonna kill them for what they did to you. But I kept hearing you calling out to me over and over again. Then I woke up. It was awful James. I never wanna ever have to go through that. It was the worst thing in my life." I explained the whole thing to him.

James just sat there and listened to me explain the dream. He just held me and listened to me. Let me cry. Told me everything was gonna be fine.

I love him so much. He's such an amazing person and he deserves so much from me that I feel like I could never give him. He's so good to me.

What could be better than him? Like honestly the best person I've ever met.

Side note: not at all what I think they look like just a picture that I put up there because I didn't feel like searching for another picture. Sorry 😬
Love you guys and please vote and comment!
XOXO ❤️❤️❤️❤️