Jungkook left a little after the clock ran eleven. I told him to go home earlier, but he insisted on staying as long as possible, because he can't stop by tomorrow. Secretly I didn't mind it. Honestly, I'm scared for tomorrow. I hate having chemo's. It hurts, and the thought of how I will feel after terrifies me. I don't fear dying, but I hate the process of dying. So, as Kook left, the silence of the hospital returned. The soft beeping of machines and the familliar dimly lit, quiet hallways. It gets silent when the evening shift leaves and the nightshift takes over. Most of the night there's a nurse at the front desk of the ward, or not. It depends.
For me, it's probably going to be another sleepless night. I have those a lot, sometimes I'm just not tired, and sometimes I let my thoughts wander to much. I managed to distract myself for a while by watching some tattoo show on the hospital tv, but after that ended around twelve thirty I decided maybe I should walk around a bit, get myself something to drink out of the coffee machine.
As I swing my legs over the edge of the bed, I turn on the small oxygen concentrator trolley placed right next to my bed, put the cannula in front of my nose and secure it behind my ears, feeling the soft airflow tickle the insides of my nose. I only have to use it if I'm walking, or leaving the hospital, for now I'm still doing fine while just sitting and moving around in my room. But I noticed longer walks take their toll. So, they gave me this trolley I can easily walk around with by rolling it behind me or carrying it like a backpack.
As I walk into the small coffee room on the ward. A soft sniffling stops me in my tracks. There, located underneath the only burning light in the room, sits a raven haired boy with his head buried in his hands. I can only see the back of his head, but I know he's crying. I swallow the small lump in my throat and bite my lip. I consider walking away and giving him some space. But the words leave my mouth before my feet can even move.
'' Are.. Are you okay?'' I ask as soft as possible trying not to startle him. He immediately stops crying, but he doesn't turn around. He simply shrugs his shoulders. '' Do you, maybe, want someone to talk to?..''
A loud bang echoes through the room. And I swear if I could, I would hold my breath. '' I hate this fucking disease! I hate what it does to people, what it turns them into! I wish they would just fucking die instead of suffer!''
I can only bite my lip hearing those words. And God.. Do I relate to everything he just said. '' I'm sorry. I know how you feel...''
'' What do you mean you kn-'' He whips himself around, and his words cut of the second he sees me.
'' Hi..'' I whisper, nervously fiddling with the tube of my cannula between my fingers. I quickly scan the boys shocked face. He looks my age, maybe a little older, he's cute. Even with his puffy eyes and tear stained cheeks. '' Fuck, shit I'm so sorry. Shit.'' He mumbles, burying his face in his hands again.
'' Don't be. It's fine. Like I said, I know how you're feeling.'' I say, walking towards the coffee machine and letting the hot water run into the paper cup, the teabag inside coloring the water a soft brown. '' How do you drink your coffee?''
It stays silent for a while until a soft voice answers back. '' Uh.. Black. Just black.'' I put my own cup between my teeth while carrying the coffee in my left hand, and pulling my trolley behind me with my right. He mumbles a soft ' thanks' as I place the cup in front of him, taking the seat across the table. '' So.. Who is it?'' I ask carfully, wrapping my hands around my own drink.
'' It's ah... My-My sister Jinae. She's ten..''
'' What is it?''
'' Leukemia.''
'' I'm so sorry.. For how long have you known?''
'' She's been in treatment for tree weeks now. I hate seeing her like this. She's hurting and she's absolutely terrified.''
I silently take a sip of my tea. And I notice the pained look on his face. '' Is it treatable?''
He only nods his head. '' Well, thats a good prospect then.''
'' I guess.. I'm sorry, maybe I just overreacted.. What.. What about you..'' He softly whispers, just now looking up at me.
'' Lung cancer.'' I say, pointing to the cannula in front of my nose. '' Oh yeah.. But.. thats treatable, right?"
'' Sadly but no, I'm dying my friend. It's just to late.'' I shrug, and I can't help but smile a little at the way he looks. '' Don't worry. I accepted my faith. I know I can't change it, even if I wanted to.''
He just nods, pointing at the now almost empty cup in my hands. '' Don't like coffee?''
'' Oh, no. On the contrary, but I'm having trouble sleeping. So I figured tea would be a better option. Not that is helps though. How come you're still here at this time of night.?'' I say emptying my cup.
'' Jinae is scared of being alone, and my parents have a business to run. They just can't be here for her al the time.''
'' What about you?'' I ask confused. '' Don't you have to go to school?''
'' I finished high school one and a half years ago. I'm taking a break from college right to stay with Jinae.''
'' That's really sweet of you. To do that for your sister.''
He thanks me and I see a soft smile appear on his lips. '' I should be going now. I don't want to be gone for to long in case she wakes up. Thank you again, for the talk. And the coffee.''
'' No problem.'' I smile as I watch him stand up. '' Are you here every day?''
'' All day, every day. Well, most of the day.'' He softly chuckles.
'' Well.. If you ever want to talk to someone again, anytime. Room 364 is mine.'' I say, unconsciously biting my lip.
'' Sure.'' He shyly smiles. He has a cute smile. '' I'll keep you to that. Goodnight... uhm-''
'' Oh! Jimin. Park Jimin.''
'' Well Jimin. I'm Yoongi. Min Yoongi.'' He says before turning around and walking away, leaving me alone with the silence again.
'' Goodnight... Min Yoongi.''
--
So, unless I need to I don't plan on making every chapter as long as this one. I know you'll be reading for hours if I did so. Don't worry tho, the chapters will still be an average length.
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