'' You're welcome hyung.'' He sits down and takes a sip of his coffee. '' My mom really missed you on christmas eve.''
'' I'm sorry.. I planned on visiting, but I just felt so bad-''
'' You don't have to justify yourself hyung, we're just glad your feeling better.'' He smiles. '' So Yoongi told me about your plans for New Years.''
'' Yeah.. Well, their his plans. He doesn't want to tell me what they are yet. But I know he had a talk with my doctors, and my mom, so I guess it must be important. I'll know in two days.'' I shrug and bury my face deeper into my scarf.
Jungkook just smiles before clearing his throat. '' Do you want to head back? We can take our drinks with us, I don't want you to catch a cold.''
--
'' You are taking me where?..''
'' Jeju.'' Yoongi says while continuing packing, what seems to be, my suitcase.
'' Yoongi, I can't go to Jeju! What about my concentrators and my wheelchair and-''
'' Baby it's all taken care of. I talked with your doctors, they gave me a list of things that need to be done and they say your good to go. And don't worry about the flight. I called the airline and got it all settled.'' He leans down placing a kiss on my forehead. '' Pretty please, Jiminie?''
I roll my eyes at his childish tone, but agree anyway. '' What time are we leaving?''
'' Tomorrow around four, our flight leaves at 18:45 so we'll be in Jeju around 20:00. I know it's late but I figured we have some time to prepare this way.''
I nod my head in response. '' Now go to bed, I'll join you in a minute.''
--
'' Are you sure you've got everything?''
'' Yes mom.''
'' Did you pack extra cannula's? And your saturation meter? Don't forge-''
'' Mom stop!'' I laugh placing my hand on her mouth. '' I am one hundred percent positive everything is settled. We'll only be gone for two days, stop worrying.''
'' I know honey..'' She sighs and pulls me into a tight hug. '' I'm just gonna miss you with new years.''
'' I'm gonna miss you too mom, but I'll be back before you know it.''
'' Are you ready to go baby? We'll be late if we don't go now.'' Yoongi steps into the hospital and I let go of my mother to sit down into my wheelchair. '' I already put everything in the taxi, so if you're ready we're good to go.''
I share a last hug with my mom before Yoongi drives me outside to enter the taxi. The ride to the airport passed in a comfortable silence. Even though Yoongi told me everything's taken care of, I'm still worried about it. Since I've been sick I've never been more then thirty minutes from home. If something would go wrong while we're in Jeju, help won't be there in a few seconds. But I trust Yoongi, I know he will never put me in a situation that can turn out wrong.
--
'' See? I told you everything would be fine didn't I?'' Yoongi says as we walk into our hotel room.
'' I hate flying.'' I yawn, letting myself fall onto the king sized bed. '' And I feel dirty.''
Yoongi leans agains the doorframe of the bathroom. '' Do you want to take a shower?''
'' Nooo...'' I pout my lips. '' I'm to tired...''
'' There's a bathtub. You can take a bath?''
'' Alright..''
'' I'll let you know when it's ready.'' Yoongi says before disappearing into the bathroom again.
While waiting I take off my tubes and turn off my concentrator. Even though I need it, it feels like I get some of my freedom back when I take it off. I'm stuck twenty four seven, constantly reminded I'm dying even on my good days. Always being stared at, being judged. It's one of the reasons I used to spend my life inside. Before I met Yoongi, I didn't want the world to see my sorrow, to see what dying looks like.
'' It's ready!'' Yoongi calls from the bathroom and I take off my shoes before making my way over. The smell of strawberries fills my nose as I step into the bathroom.
'' Hmm.. Smells really good, thank you'' I mumble, lazily wrapping my arms around Yoongi's waist, resting my head on his chest.
'' Of course baby.'' He softly says pulling back from the hug. '' Now go on and get in before the water gets cold.''
I bite my lip as my hands reach for his. I feel my cheeks already heat up and I haven't even spoken my mind yet.
'' What's going on Jim?''
'' Can.. you stay?...'' I whisper so softly I wonder if it was even heard.
'' Do you need help?''
I shake my head, keeping my eyes down on our hands.
A soft chuckle echoes and a soft hand strokes my cheeks, hooking itself under my chin to make our eyes meet. '' Sure love.'' He whispers. '' You get in okay? I'll be back in a second.'' He says before stepping out of the bathroom.
I strip myself off my clothes and carefully step into the bathtub. Yoongi steps back into the room just as I sit down. '' Where did you go?'' I quietly ask.
'' Just grabbing something.'' He smiles squatting in front of the bathtub. '' Are you sure your fine with this?''
I nod my head and hum in response. Yes, it nerves me, but Yoongi is my boyfriend. This is just another step into our relationship. Plus, he's already seen me naked, so that's not what I'm worried about.
'' Alright..'' He stands up to take of his clothes, and I turn my eyes down when I notice him taking off his pants. '' Okay, scoot forward a bit..''
The water softly splashes and two legs appear next to me while two arms wrap around my waist, pulling me back.
'' Is this okay?'' He whispers in my ear and I frozenly nod my head. '' Relax baby..'' He says, leaning me back until I'm laying on his chest, his fingers are drawing small patterns on my belly, making my skin fill with goosebumps.
*
The soft sounds of music fills the room, and I notice the small speaker standing on the sink.
I close my eyes and let out a content sigh. I haven't felt this calm in a long time. I never felt as safe as I do now. So happy yet, so sad.
I hope, that when I die. It will be like this. Calm, quiet, safe.
In the end, I want to die where I feel home.
Resting in the arms of love.
--
I'm still trying to match up the timeframes but its haaaard :(
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