Rental [yoonmin]

49.

Hoseok looked ahead as the silence only grew more. It was obvious something was wrong because he could feel it.

Jungkook was being distant. He hated the feeling. "Do you need to tell me something?" Hoseok finally asked.

If he was going to get heartbroken he wanted Jungkook to go ahead and pull of the band-aid. No sugar coating, no, none of that.

Jungkook nodded slowly as he turned to look at him. "I talked to, Taehyung a few days ago."

Hoseok's heart sunk, "Oh, okay. And what happened?" He ask as he struggled to speak.

"We hugged. He apologized."

"Okay," he responded. He hadn't talked to Taehyung because he wasn't responding to the text messages he had sent him. He understood why Taehyung was hurt, but so was he.

Hoseok just felt so tied between them both. Neither Jungkook nor Taehyung were making him pick, but he knew he had to.

He couldn't have one without breaking the other. That was a lot to handle. He loved them both. He wanted them both to be happy. He just couldn't bring himself to decide.

"You were almost mine, weren't you?" He whispered.

Jungkook gulped, "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry," he repeated. He hated himself for making Hoseok this sad.

"I want to be with you." He simply said. The words were chocked out. He was clenching his hands on the bench tightly.

His hands were almost white from his grip. He didn't want to let go. "Do you still love him?" He stupidly asked.

It was very evident he did. So why did he need to hear it? To break his heart more?

"Listen, I know he's my best friend. I know this situation fucking sucks, okay? But, I can't let you go. I can't let go of this feeling. You give me butterflies, you brighten up my day, since that kiss we shared I haven't been able to stop thinking about you. I've been wondering where you've been all my life and how I possibly lived without you for this long."

"Hoseok," Jungkook breathed.

"I'm in love with you, Jungkook. If you just give me one chance I will show you how much. Don't throw this away. Don't make me let go. I don't want to." He said full of sadness.

Jungkook's eyes filled with tears. If he could only correspond to the love. If it were only that easy he would love him without a doubt.

However, his conscious would never let him. And he knew deep inside, Hoseok's conscious wouldn't let him either.

Hoseok was too pure and too selfless to betray his best friend like that. Right now, that's not what he was thinking of that.

He was letting his emotions control him at the moment and Taehyung's feelings hadn't even crossed his mind.

"Please, fuck," he breathed feeling himself her choked up. "for God's sake, please feel the same." He pleaded.

Jungkook breath hitched. His heart sunk and now he could see it clear. He was the Taehyung in his life.

"Maybe we can fix each other." He added as he held Jungkook's face in his hands.

"I wish it could be that way. I'm sorry but this won't work out. Won't you feel guilty? He's your best friend, Hoseok."

Hoseok slowly let go of his face. He looked at Jungkook and saw his whole entire world. "I just want to see you smile. I just want to make you mine," he slowly said.

It took a few minutes before he could get the words out. He could tell by the look Jungkook was giving him that he would never feel the same.

"But, that's okay. I know you don't feel the same. I just want you to know that if you want to be with him that's okay too. As long as he respects you and cares for you. I don't want him to treat you the way he has. Just promise me one thing,"

Jungkook nodded quickly. "Promise me that no matter how much you adore him, if he ever treats you badly you will let go. You deserve to be picked first undoubtedly. Don't ever let him or any one else make you feel like you're a second choice because you're not. Promise me that, Jungkook."

"I promise." He said.

Hoseok smiled, "Good. I love you." He said pulling him in for a hug. Jungkook returned the hug laying his head against his chest.

Hoseok was swallowing the knot on his throat. His eyes were building up with tears and they spilled in a matter of seconds.

Fortunately, Jungkook couldn't see because his head was still resting on his chest. Maybe he could hear Hoseok's heart breaking.

He tried to not think about the goodbye. He tried to think of the happy times he spent with him.

It was nearly impossible to do so. How was he suppose to cope with this emotional wreck when he felt like his heart wasn't even in his chest anymore?

Jungkook would take that with him for sure.

Regardless of how broken he was he didn't regret meeting Jungkook. He never would. It had been the best thing that ever happened in his life.

He wished he would've cherish those sweet moments with him more, held his hand more, caressed his face more, hugged him more, spoke to him more and just about everything else.

Because sometimes you didn't appreciate a person as much. You assume that they will be there forever and that those moments will never end.

Except, that's not always the case. And Hoseok felt like he took Jungkook for granted. He wished he could go back and relive every single moment they were together.

Hoseok laid his head on top of Jungkook's and kissed his messy hair. He held him tighter to remember his sweet scent.

Maybe, one day Jungkook will change his mind. Or maybe not, and maybe Hoseok will find someone else.

Nonetheless, he would always love Jungkook.

Some people, loved cigarettes or drugs, and Hoseok just happened to love the boy with brown eyes, even though everything you love will eventually kill you one day.

That day happened to be today.

—

guys there's only a few more chapters left ;o
i have developed another story idea in my head woop woop. thnx for reading and for all the support you've given me! every vote, comment and read is important to me as a writer :')
glad to know my stories are appreciated <3