Runaway//a blesiv love story 😍

the tapes !!

a- what are the tapes 

j- there are 5 tapes in each tape I explain how my year went 

h-what?

j-okay let me explain every year since I was 10 only a few minutes before a new year starts I  make a tape explaining the goods and the bads of that year ive never showed anyone but lets hear the 

b-okay lets pop in 2014 ooooh 10 year old jen lets do this 

de-okay everyone stfu I want to hear 

tape 1-*5 years earlier*

j- hi I don't know how to do this but hi future jen its me...jen well im still 10 im just going to explain my year and whats happened its 11:52 pm only minutes before midnight the new year im kinda sad I don't want to go to 6th grade its going to be horrible but im pretty happy to say we stoped playing with toys this year it just got really old also we still like josh from kinder garden but he's moving soon also there this other boy his mom is friends with my mom we used to be friends but he's so mean now I think he's my bully now he always calls me names it not nice like fudge him what a female dog he is oh his name is brandon he's ugly also something serious happened a few months ago mom and dad have been acting weird I think their gonna divorce also mom says she doesn't think ill ever grow up and dads always saying ill never amount to anything *sniffs* *crying*its so hard to think they'd ever say that its been different with them since they've said that also zoe keeps coming into my room it so annoying oh look at that its 11:59 ready count with me future jen 3...2...1 HAPPPY NEW YEARSSSS !!!

c-fudge?jen wtf 

j- I was 10 and thought the devil would pull my toes at night if I cused so don't even fuckin judge 

b-number 2 year of 2015 11 year old jen 

tape 2-*4 years earlier*

j- hey future me technaccly its 11:47 almost new years well this year was pretty good....id say actually it was amazing well most of it lets start with I got my first boyfriend this year you wont belive who it is oh well maybe you remember but its brandon wenstenberg ik we said we hated him but he's so different he listens to me when no one else does hes my boyfriend but hes also my best friend and im so happy to have him but also I cant be with him all day and I have no one to talk to when hes gone I feel like im always sad for no reason its become and everyday thing to cry myself to sleep every night and it feels like hell I started cutting myself this year my arms hurt so much there getting infected but I cant ask for help everytime something happens I cut deeper and deeper *crying*just wishing itll all end oh look just hit 12 happy new years I hope we get better 

de-are you kidding you started cutting at 11 

b-I remember you'd hate me telling you to take off your sweater then one day you did and showed me we were what?12?

j-yea 

a-*hugs jen*

J-*hugs alex *

b-3rd tape now 

tape 3 -*3 years earlier*

j-hey future jen it jen...obviously like wtf am I saying oh yea we started cusing this year yea we were like fuck it if we go to hell we go to hell *laughs*kidding this year has probly been the worst its 11:39 a little early but what ever right nothing really matters any more were still sad for no reason really and just really mad like no one understands us they just don't get no one understands but us and ofc brandon hes the best thing and blessing that's ever happened to me we still cut we promised brandon we'd stop and im trying I hate seeing him hurt because of me also we started getting axiety attacks they feel so scary we haven't tloen anyone but brandon about them also early july this year we started um...smoking getting high its an amazing feeling mom knows she says I always let her down and if I keep going down the road im going down she'll disown me *crying* I wonder if she hates me well got to go spending new years by myself like always bye 

g-12 you smoked at 12 

j-it was the only way i'd be able to make the day at school ok you cant judge 

g-im not just that's bad for your health 

j-ik and I've quit 

TBC!!!!!