Spookyness

My Girl

*Credit to SleepDeprivedPuppy on reddit*        

Her name is Jessica. She is 26 years old, and she is my girl. I had never believed in love at first sight until I met her. It was a rainy day in September last year. I was sitting in the shelter of the bus stop waiting for the rain to slow down so I could continue my walk to my apartment, when she sat down on the bench next to me with her newspaper. I couldn't help but stare at her for just a moment too long. I think she sensed I was watching her, because she looked up at me with her wide, blue eyes, her dark hair falling in her face. I instantly fell in love with her. We chatted for a while; she seemed nervous that her bus was delayed. It finally arrived about 10 minutes late, and I hopped up on the bus with her so we could continue our conversation. We hit it off right away. I watched her get off at her stop, walk to her house, and go in. Then I walked home with butterflies in my stomach.

I moved in with Jessica about two months after we met. We were both so happy. She used to sing so beautifully when she was getting ready for work in the mornings, when she cooked dinner when she came home, when she got ready for bed. It gave me butterflies all over again when she would smile. I never imagined that I could be so happy.

We did everything together. We went to movies, jogged in the park, and I loved watching her play video games. I had never been much of a gamer, but watching her play was always so much fun to me. Life seemed so perfect.

That was, until her mother passed away three months after I moved in. Jessica began to isolate herself after that. She became so depressed that she would spend days in her bed, not moving, not sleeping. When she did sleep, she would whimper softly and babble nonsense, waking in a panic. Our home no longer echoed with her singing voice. It was replaced with the sounds of her crying, from gentle whimpers to bouts of loud sobbing. Her constant sniffles could be heard from every room in the house. She almost never left, and her friends stopped coming over; she refused to answer the door when they knocked. She locked herself in the bedroom. I was so afraid to leave her alone that I called my boss and quit my job. I never told her, but she never asked.

I felt so trapped. I couldn't leave. I couldn't eat. I sleep 4 hours per night if I'm lucky. Hell, if I have to go to the bathroom, I hold it until I'm afraid that I might pee my pants. If I'm not watching her, she might... I don't want to think about what she might do. I try carry on with life and try to keep a positive attitude. I live with the love of my life, and when she's sleeping, I get to curl up in bed next to her and hold her hand while spooning her, hoping that my touch might comfort her.

Within these last few months, Jessica has become paranoid. She claims that she is being watched by her mother's ghost. She wanders from room to room, yelling, "Mama, I know you're here with me. Please show yourself to me. I miss you so much." It breaks my heart to watch and listen to her talking to the empty rooms, but it seems to comfort her in ways I cannot. She seems able to relax more; it must be therapeutic. She has begun feeling comfortable leaving the bed, then eventually leaving the house. She started singing again, softly and shakily at first, but now her voice is almost back to how it was. Not quite, but close. She believes her mother's ghost likes hearing it. I suppose I should let her continue her delusion. It seems to be helping, and now I sometimes get a chance to go out for some fresh air and some food. I suppose it is helping me too.

However, she has become forgetful. I hear her constantly asking herself, "I swear I put my slippers next to the bed." or "Did I already eat that leftover spaghetti?" She blames the ghost for moving her things, I think. She started to become more talkative, speaking on the phone with her friends more. She tells them that she hears noises in the house when no one else is home. She says it has to be her mother watching over her, right? I never hear her friends' responses, and I never ask. I just continue on, my love for her never wavering.

Yesterday, she told one of her friends that for a really long time, she has felt like she is being watched. She found a small hole, about as big around as a pencil, in her bedroom ceiling. As she wandered around the house, she found at least one in each room. She heard a noise in the attic, but she convinced herself it was just a raccoon or a squirrel or something.

Thank god she hasn't come up to the attic. Because I don't know what I would do if she found me here, always watching her through the holes in her ceiling.