promise // matthew espinosa

Chapter 22

~ Matt

As Brianna was recovering, I spent most nights in the hospital waiting room. She seemed to be getting better each day. She no longer needed the cup over her mouth, and the bandages on her wrists weren't as bloody as before. The tubes remained in there place, pumping her stomach 24/7. Talking was still off limits as well. At least I could see her beautiful face. I never thought I would fall this hard, especially for a fan. Don't get me wrong, I love all of my fans, but something about Brianna just makes her stand out.

~ Shawn

I debated whether or not to tell Matt what had happened after the YouNow. It doesn't seem like a big deal, but I can't help but blame myself for it. I finally decided I should say something.

"Hey, Matt?" I asked as he walked into the waiting room.

"What's up?"

"Umm, I have something to tell you."

His face showed suspicion. Oh God.

"What is it?"

"So, on the night we arrived at the beach house, after you fell asleep, Brianna and I did a YouNow under #singing. She was getting a lot of hate and looked really hurt. Most of it was directed towards her weight. We stopped the livestream and decided to get some food, since she was saying how she was hungry earlier. There was pizza in the kitchen. I let her choose first, and she chose the smaller slice. I'm kind of getting the feeling that the hate is why she stopped eating," I explained nervously.

Matt was staring into space, probably trying to process what I just said.

"Huh.."

"I thought you should know. I'm sorry I didn' t tell you earlier. I didn't really think of her taking a small slice of pizza as a big deal at the time."

"Did you comfort her?"

"Wha-?"

"Did. you. comfort. her."

"Sorta.."

"How."

"Well, I told her that the fans don't really like seeing me with another girl."

"Did you tell her it wasn't true?"

"That what wasn't true."

"The hate, Shawn. About her weight?"

"Umm..no, I don't think so."

"She's not fat, you know."

"I never said she was."

"You never told her otherwise."

"I never really thought to. She seemed fine with the hate she was getting on Twitter. I didn't think it would bug her so much."

"Well, it did."

He started walking away, not looking back at me. He was headed towards Brianna's room..

"I'm sorry Matt!" I yelled back.

No answer.

~ Matt

I walked down to Brianna's room. I couldn't believe what I just heard from Shawn. He saw the hate. He saw what she was becoming, and he did absolutely nothing about it. I entered the room and sat down on the floor beside her. I was tall enough to where the surface of the bed was right below my chest height. She looked down at me and smiled that adorable smile.

"How are you?" I asked.

She smiled again and did a thumbs up. It wouldn't be long before all this smiling brought pain to her stomach again. I wish she wouldn't have to go through all of this.

"Good. Can I tell you something?"

She nodded.

"You're not fat. Not even close. Fat is a word used to make thinner girls feel better about themselves. It's a stereotype, Brianna. You are perfect just the way you are."

I could see tears begin to form in her eyes. She started wincing again.

"No, no, no. Please don't cry. I hate to see you in pain."

I gently wiped the tears off her cheeks with my thumb, careful not to bump the tubes.

"I love you, Brianna."

She smiled again. I smiled back.

"I love that smile!" I said jumping up and down, pretending to fangirl.

She started to giggled, then gasped and gripped the edges of the bed, breathing heavily. Laughing probably hurt her too.

"Oh shit. I'm sorry. Should I get a nurse?"

She shook her head. I grabbed her hand and held onto it tightly as she slowly controlled her breathing.

"I love you so much."

I leaned in and kissed her forehead. As I was about to leave, I heard a rapid tapping noise. I turned around to see her hitting her hand on the little side table. She looked at me, then pointed to one of the chairs in the room.

"You want me to stay?" I asked.

She nodded and smiled again.

God I love that smile.

~