• Zion Kuwonu Imagines •

{41} PHASES Pt.2 😭

y/n's POV

WARNING ⚠️: MENTION OF RAPE

I've learned that the more you try to cover that hole that is deep inside you, that one day you'll end up falling in it.

When Zion said he would be done with me if I didn't change ways, I really thought he was just mad and he'll get over it.

But I was wrong. I haven't heard from him all day, he usually calls me to check on me and see if we could hang but he didn't.

I can't say that it didn't hurt, but it did and I did it to myself. It's just that after my mom's death I was destroyed. My mom was my everything to me growing up and I never wanted her to leave me, and once she did I turned to alcohol and weed to numb the pain.

Zion understood but he didn't understand, the pain felt unreal, my heart aches at the thought of her being taken away from me, but getting drunk and high is the only way for me to coop with it.

I know that Zion cares and that he wants what's best for me, but I have to do things on my own, I'm an adult, not a kid anymore, if my actions have consequences then I'll have to deal with it.

I'm at this club with my girl best friend (y/bff/n) she wanted me to forget about Z and just have fun. Her moto is 'live in the moment, before you stop living'. It was inspirational but so corny.

There was never a second I wasn't wondering what Zion was doing. I've always wondered why he'd stick around even though I'm a fucking train wreck.

I've put him through a lot of shit and he still wanted to tolerate me, and I took it all for granted. I wish he would just talk or text me, Zion was the only person that kept me sane.

Without him, I'm confused and lost,it kinda sucks to be me right now, I simply can't do anything right without messing it up.

"You need to stop being sad and miserable and get wasted and forget about Zion." (y/bff/n) she said handing me a glass, filled with Hennessy.

I took the glass from her hand and she walked away to go dance on some random guy she just met.

I let out a chuckle as I watch my girl best friend grind against the man. I looked down at the cup of Hennessy. I mind was telling me to not do it but my body was telling me 'fuck it'

I quickly down the alcohol, and the liquid burns my throat but I didn't really mind it. I told the bartender to keeping making shots and just drink them like they were nothing until I couldn't feel anything.

My body felt numb and slump and I couldn't really control what I was doing, but I kept drinking and drinking. At a moment I couldn't even walk by on my own.

I was wasted, in pain and completely vulnerable. I just keep feeling bad for myself and it's really ruining my life and keep drinking and I know it's bad for me, but I keep doing it.

I'm so stubborn that I don't want to admit that I have a problem, but I do and it's hard to stop.

I get up from my seat at the bar and wobble over to (y/bff/n) almost falling a couple of times. Once I reached her she was still grinding on the random guy, and she was drunk as well.

"I thinkkkk it's time to gooooo." I say, slurring my words. I started leaning forward, falling but (y/bff/n) and the random guy catch me on time.

"How about We'll take you home and then we'll come back to the club and party some more." (y/bff/n) said, she grabbed my arm and wrapped it around her shoulders and the random guy does the same too.

We walk out of the club and for some reason me and (y/bff/n) could not stop laughing. I didn't live so far from the club l, so it was a good ten minute walk.