Are You Crying, Too?

A Helping Friend

Every day was seemed to be the same day repeating over and over again.  The same shitty day.  A day of hero work as number one.  A day without Deku.  The only thing that ever changes is the guilt I feel.  It increases with every memory that comes up from my mind of him.  With every shout, every insult I threw at him.  It was all just a collage of every moment I spent with him.  

"Hay!  It's Ground Zero!  Let's go see him!" The voice of a young boy collided with my ear.  I turned my head to look at the brat.  I was in my hero costume, patrolling, and kids sometimes walked up to me and asked for my autograph.  I watched as the young boy and two of his friends jogged up to me.

"What the hell do you want?" I spat at them.

"We were wondering if we could have your autograph, Ground Zero!" The boy from before said.  He handed me a pen for me to sign a paper of his with.  After signing it I looked at his other friends, but my attention was mostly kept to the kid farthest from me.  He was staring at me and his body seemed frozen.  His eyes were glazed in admiration.  He had dark green hair and compelling green eyes to match.  He looked slightly like Deku.  My eyes narrowed at him.  I singed the boys paper and walked closer to Deku's mimic.  He even had that silly T-shirt Deku wore that said T-shirt in Katakana.  

"What are you, a Deku wannabe?" I questioned.  The kids eyes widened.  Was he surprised that I actually talked to him?  The kid nodded his head hesitantly.  

"I wanna become just like him!"  He acted like Deku used to too.  If I didn't move right then and there, I was sure that I would cry.  

I stared at him before saying, "Good luck, kid," I patted his hair down while walking past him.  I wish I said those word to Deku.  But I knew that it was to late now.
"You're so lucky!" I heard the first brat speak.  I ignored them and continued to do my job.  

}×××××××××××××××××××××{

"Hey, Bakugou!" I heard my name being called.  

"What is it, shitty hair?" I grumbled.  I watched as Kirishima put his arm around my shoulder.

"How's it goin'?" He questioned.  I looked away from him and mumbled,

"Go away," I huffed.  Kirishima took his arm off of me.  I saw him frown in the peripheral of my vision.

"You're still hung up over it, huh?" He stated more so then asked.  My gaze followed my feet.
"Try and get some sleep, okay?  And eat some more.  You'll lose all of your muscles of you keep starving yourself." 

I turned my eyes to look at him, "Yeah, sure."

Kirishima frowned, "You have bags under you're eyes.  I'm surprised that they don't reach the floor yet....!" He tried making a joke.  

"You're worse then Sero." 

"Ouch!" Shitty hair was silent for the next five minutes.

"Hey, wanna have a bro sleepover party? Me, Sero, and Kaminari are already doing it."

I stared at him, "Why the he'll would I go to a fucking party with you?"

"You need to have some fun, man.  Come on!" I took a second to reply.

"You're a fucking idiot." His eyes fleshed happily.

"So it's a 'yes!' Great!"  He then proceeded to give me information about the shitty party and then he left after that.

Shitty hair was the only one that knew about my feelings for Deku.  He knows that I'm not doing to well and he's trying his best to cheer me up.  His efforts make me want to smile.  But I remained stoic, an angry frown set upon my face.

I wanted to thank him as he was walking away, but the pride that I held right beside my heart forbade me to.  He wanted me to heal, to go back to who I was.  He knows me better than anyone, and he knows that somewhat deep inside me, I was completely and utterly broken.  And he's there to help me heal.  Knowing him, he'll try and put the pieces of my heart together.  And he won't ever stop until any of the cracks that were once there could no longer be seen.  That was just him.

I was grateful.  And even if my pride got in the way of saying it, he knew.  He always knew what I was feeling deep down inside of me.  That's how he figured out that I liked Deku.

Class 2-A lived in the dorms and it was the second year of them going to U.A.  Kaminari had just been pranked and scared out of his mind.  He was being an idiot with his thumbs pointing up, almost as if to say 'everything's all right.' Me and Kirishima were watching him make a fool out of himself in the hallway when Kirishima popped the question.

"Hey, I've been wondering...  Do you like Deku?" 

I had freaked out and asked him,"Why the hell would I like that nerd!?"  While I jumped to stand before him with my hand raised into the air, explosions crackling loudly.

"So you do, huh?" He smiled softly, almost like he was disappointed.  

"And who told you that, huh!?" I had screamed, clenching my fists into tight ball.

He nodded his head to himself as he whispered, "It's easy to tell.  If you didn't like him you would have tried to kill me. "

I growled, " And don't try to deny it. "

I marched up to my dorm room, enraged.

That's how he found out.  That's how I found out too.  He told me that I liked Deku when I didn't even know that I liked him in the first place.  I beat myself up for falling for a loser.  For falling for Deku. How could I unknowingly fall for a crybaby?  How?  

Even after this revelation, I kept my feelings a secret to everyone.  I didn't want anyone to find out.  If someone found out that I loved him and they told everyone, my reputation would be ruined.  My pride...  My stupid pride got in the way of everything.  If it weren't for my pride, I would have told Deku that I loved him.  I would have told him, and maybe he'd still be alive.  Maybe...

I shook my head to get rid of the thought.  I could think about this when I got home.
I kept my gaze forward throughout the rest of the day, trying my best to not remember anymore.  Trying my best to forget, for that little while, about Deku.