White Lies ~~Cameron Dallas~~

Pt 1 Little Red Secrets

Authors Note: This is my first story...ever . Im really nervious so please dont hate me if you dont like it or anything cause I get enough of that at school. Tell me if I should change anything and any questions please say. I wont bite. :) Thanks for reading anyways.

Astrids POV

Everyday was the same for me. Wake up, go to school, pushed, hit, laughed at, go home, cry, sleep. Nothing were to change this routine that I knew of. I only had one friend and she...died in a car crash. We were best friends ever since we left our mothers womb. She was older then me by a year. She was my knight in shining armor. She was there when I needed someone. She was there when someone hurt me. She was the one, and now shes gone because of me.

~~ Flashback  15 years old ~~

"Astrid whats wrong? Did someone do something...I bet it was James. That little prick." I smiled at my best friends way of trying to cheer me up. Her light blond hair was resting on her shoulders and her face was filled with the freckles that I have learned to adored. Her jade green eyes were filled with concern and worry. When did I deserve someone like her.

"No, its Greg. He was sent to the hospital again. This time its more worse then it was before. They don't think hes ganna make it this time." I slide down the bathroom wall and put my face in my hands and started to cry. Hes only ten. He hasn't even traveled, or even had a girlfriend. I felt Gina pull me into her small body.

"How about I go out and get junk food, chick flicks and books for us to read. You're not coming tho." I looked at her and frowned.

I asked why not but she didn't reply, she just up and left nothing was said between us. No "Thank you." No "I'll be back." No "I love you." Nothing. And I regret that know that it would have been the last time I'll see my best friend.

She was a year older then me but I still loved that girl.

~~Flashback over~~

I felt fresh tears fall down my face. It annoyed me when I cried. It showed me I was weak, worthless, stupid. I whipped away my tears roughly hopping that it will get rid of the stains that are left on my cheek. The stains of memories that have left my eyes multiple times and have left me heart broken.

"Astrid can you come down stairs I need to talk to you." I looked in my full body length mirror and checked if my hazel eyes were red. They were slightly tinted with red but it would go past un-noticed seeing as tho all my mother cares about, is herself.

I ran down the soft carpeted stairs and turned left into the lounge. She was sitting on the couch with her knees crossed and head hung low. I cautiously walked towards her and sit down next to her on the brown leather couch. As soon as I did she looked into my eyes.

"We're moving to Chino Hills,California."I looked her dead in the eyes and waited for her not to blink. When she lies she wouldn't blink for a while.

"No Mom I cant." Don't get me wrong I'm happy but I'm also terrified. Imagine if they don't like me. Wait why would I care nobody likes me anyways. Everywhere I go I always get teased, hit. Everything, you could name.

"Sweetie you don't have a choice. Please just listen for once and go with it."I nodded and tried to hold back my tears, but failed. I ran back up stairs towards my room. I heard my mothers faint yells but I blocked it out and locked my door. I started pacing around as I felt my every thought fill my dark room making it feel even more cramped then it was before. I hit my forehead trying to get the voice out of my head.

"Their going to hate you as much as I hate you".

"Their going to hurt you until you feel your limbs bleed".

"Your going to suffer till you kill yourself and you know it."

My tears were falling more faster and more bigger then a second ago. I yelled and pulled my hair constantly until I couldn't take it no more. All this was getting to my head and I know if I don't get help I'll be put back into therapy.

I walked over to my bathroom and opened my draw with shaky hands. Grabbing my blade out and put it on the sink. I looked at my wrist then back at the blade. I dropped to the floor with the object in my hand and was ready to let everything go.

I dug the sharp blade deep into my wrist and felt myself at ease from the touch of the cold metal. Every cut was less painful then everything that I have been through. Every cut was as deep as my mind went.

Bitch. Slut. Worthless. Weird. Dumb. Ugly. Hoe. Waste of space. Jerk. Mistake. Fake. Fat. Alone.

The blood slowly oozes out of my wrist and on to my tiled floor with my broken and lost thoughts. I throw the blade at the wall across from me and crawl as far as I can away from the silver metal and rocked myself in the corner.

"How can I hide my secrets when their on my wrist written in red."