My Hijab,Jake and I.

Chapter Eight/Leaving

Medina

The project is finally completed and we came first place.. Also Mr Sloan was so pleased with our model that he decided to display it at the local community centre. He wanted the locals to enjoy and see how talented the children are. Mr Sloan, happy and chirpy is a rare site so I guess we have definitely done something right to see him in this new light.

The credit should have gone to all four of us. Natasha, Sophie and I were there to bask in our achievement. Jake has been awol for a week now. This is so unusual off Jake as he never misses a day, not that he isn't tempted, what with the likes of Hassan and Paul to lead him astray. He fears the wrath of Mrs White, his mother. Jake is a momma's boy and he is not ashamed of it at all.

My mind wanders to the last time I had seen him. It was that evening at Natasha's when he wanted to walk me home. I had made my way to the bus stop expecting him to follow me as he was a stubborn fool. However I got on the bus alone. I guess Natasha must have had something to do with him not following me.

The three of us are left wondering where the hell he could be. I try to act as if I don't care and that I don't miss his presence, but God, I do. How can I not. His always been a part of my life, always in my face annoyingly. I guess I can ask his parents. Maybe their answer will satisfy my wandering thoughts.

‘’Earth to Medina. Helloooo Medinaaaa’’. Natasha's voice breaks me away from my thoughts.

‘’Sorry guys. What were you saying?.’’ I look at them both.

Both of them share a look amongst themselves. I know that look. It's a look the three of share on each other. This time it’s my turn I guess. Sighing I await. One..two..th…..

‘’We were ‘saying’ that you need to get a grip Medina. Weren't we Soph?’’ Natasha elbows Sophie into agreeing.

‘’Yes Medina. You just haven't been yourself for the past few days’’. Sophie looks at me with concern.

‘’Er no. To be more specific. ‘You’ haven't been yourself since a ‘certain someone has done a houdini disappearing act’’. Natasha finished rolling her eyes and crossing her arms.

‘’I don't know what your talking about Tasha.’’I reply defensibly. My cheeks heats up when they both send me pitying looks. Damn. the perils of having best friends. Even your thoughts are not private. Frigging mind readers.

‘’Medina darling. Don't even go there girl. We know what's bugging you. I just don't get  why u let it. The poor guy doesn't know where he stands with your hot and colds feelings.’’Natasha blurts out whilst Sophie sends her a look to say shut up.

‘’Oh.Why don’t you tell me what you really think.’’I reply sarcastically. I refuse to let the tears show. I hate that she may be right. I hate myself for being this way, feeling this way.

Before I know it I’m engulfed by both of them. I know they mean well. I know that Nastasha has hit the nail right on the head. I need to stop living like this. I need to be strong. I need to keep my faith strong. I had to rid my thoughts of Jake William White once and for all.

                                                                                                    ooooooooooooooooooooooo

I finish tidying up with Mama. Sarina is busy finishing of her homework whilst Abu is in the den watching the Pakistan news. I don't know what fascination the news back home holds for Abu. It's a requirement in most Pakistanis household. The news channel. I find it miserable as hell so I avoid at all cost. Ignorance is bliss I guess.

I’m about to head upstairs when I hear the doorbell go. I walk across the hallway to get it as I was closer. Opening it I find Kelly standing there with a cute stuffed pink bear in her arms. She looks a bit sad for my liking and without a word she hugs me fiercely.

I instantly return the hug and we stay that way. I hear her crying softly. I hold her chin and force her to stare into my eyes. My hearty twinges as she has the exact same color eyes as her brother.

Beautiful emerald green with thick curled lashes.

‘’What's the matter Kelly bear’’I ask her quietly.’’Why so blue’’

She stares at me and hugs me again. I gently bring her inside and close the door. I take her to the kitchen which I find empty, mama's probably gone to sit with Abu in the den. It's their cuddle time and we leave them to it. Sitting her down in one of the dining chairs I crouch in front of her so I can be eye level.

‘’Talk to me Kelly Bear’’. I prod gently.

She looks at me with those amazing familier eyes and tears wells in them again.

‘’It's Jake’’. My stomach flips at the mention of his name.

‘’Er. What about him?’’.

‘’His gone’’. Another tummy flip and my heart flutters.

‘’Where?..Why?’’ I Try not to sound frantic. Why am I feeling this way. Shi..Sugar I feel my own eyes welling up. Taking A breath I try to calm down to see Kelly Looking at me strangely. Fudge.

‘’Well he had a talk with mom and dad before he left.  Then had a private talk with mom later. Said his goodbyes to me and then packed a small bag and just went.’’ She said tearfully whilst hugging her little pink bear to her chest.

‘’Did he tell you why he was leaving Kelly bear’’. I ask quietly, but I think I had a very good guess.

‘’Oh that he needed a break. That he was going up north to stay with uncle Joe.’’

‘’Uncle Joe! That’s Mrs white little brother’’. I questioned her.

‘’Yes. Uncle Joe is the best. I guess If he was to be anywhere then that is the best place, but I miss him Medina. I know he rings me every night but it’s not the same’’. She looks so lost and I take her in my arms.

I don't blame her for they are very close. Even Sarina has been feeling his absence. Jake has the kind of personality that just grabs hold of your heart and you have no choice to let him in. His an annoying bloody bastard but a loving annoying bastard.. Sorry I’m so angry. The bastard just left not realising the hurt he will be causing. I’m getting pissed and when I do my colourful vocabulary makes an appearance.

‘’Shh .It'll be ok Kelly Bear’’. Partially feeling guilty, for if my assumption is right then I’m definitely the cause of him leaving.

Coward. How can he just leave without explaining himself to me. Not even a note. I’m not thinking straight and all I see is him being in the wrong. I just not want to think further than that. I know if I do then maybe I will find myself more sympathetic to his actions but I refuse to go there. Bloody Jake and his selfish behaviour.

The tears are back and this time I let them win. I cry for the way things have turned out. I cry for this heart broken little girl who is missing her big brother. Kelly’s embrace brings me comfort as she is the next best thing in being close to Jake and I hold onto that like a lifeline.

We are so lost in the moment that it's only when I feel another set of arms join us that I look up to see Sarina. She to has tears in her eyes. She must have heard everything. So without further words the three of us stay hurdled on the kitchen floor. Jake William White has gone but he has left a lot of broken hearts behind.