Just A Little Bit Of Your Heart ~ Randy

24: I Hate You (I Love You)

Rye's P.O.V

"Rye, what's the point?" Brook said, looking at Mikey. My best friend nodded in agreement and I scowled at the fact they were disagreeing with me.

"You know, Brooklyn! I have a gut feeling Andy's in England, and they're all covering up for him. He's my husband, for Christ's sake, and he's carrying our baby. I still love him, Brooky," I said, just breaking down.

"I know, Rye. I know. Okay, fine. We'll spend two days there. If we don't find him ourselves, we come back, okay?"

I wanted to refuse, say that we would stay for however long it took me to find him. But I knew Brook and Mikey would disagree.

"Okay. We leave tomorrow."

I went to my room, holding Andy's necklace in my hand. These months that had passed without him were excruciatingly long, and I didn't know how much longer I could go. Nothing could describe the regret and the guilt I felt for everything I'd done to Andy, and wanted more than anything for him to forgive me so we could raise our child together.

I fell asleep with the necklace pressed to my lips, and I felt sure that we would find Andy.

The next day

"What if he really isn't there? Then we would've just wasted our time," Mikey said. I raised an eyebrow.

"God, you're beginning to sound like Alex, mate."

I'd decided to fire Alex; not only had he forced himself onto Andy, he became more annoying when Andy was gone. I got sick of it and told him to go, paying him for the next month.

We got the jet out to England as quickly as possible.

"Are you going to the castle?" Mikey asked. I shook my head, looking out of the window.

"I can't. They'll know I'm looking for him and it'll ruin everything. I have to wait it out, and hope he goes out somewhere," I shrugged. It wasn't a cast iron plan, so I could only pray it would work. We decided to get a hotel somewhere between the mall and the castle so it was easy to get to both.

***

I followed close behind my brother as we went to get some food, not liking anything in the hotel. There were a lot of people here in the mall so I kept the hood of my jacket up. I kept bumping into people, having to constantly apologise. But one person ran behind me, only for me to knock into them.

"Shit," they growled quietly.

"Oh, I'm so-" I turned around, met with shocked, beautiful blue eyes. "Andy."

I looked him up and down, noticing his stomach underneath the baggy shirt. He looked down, whilst trying to pick up the things he'd dropped. I gathered them up and handed it all back to him.

"Ryan..."

Ryan? Since when had he called me that?

"And, you okay?" A voice said, a boy running up to us. I stared at him for a few seconds, something clicking in my head.

"Andy, he's the one who shot you! Get away from him," I said, trying to grab my husband's arm. He pulled it away from me, and I saw the immense amount of hurt in his eyes.

"I forgave him. He's helped me these past few months," Andy said quietly. I stared between the two, absolutely baffled.

"Baby, I'm so sorry," I said, taking Andy's hand. This time, he didn't flinch away, but stared at our hands.

"Don't call me that."

"What? Andy..."

"Do you realise how much you hurt me, Ryan Beaumont? To know my own husband doesn't love me and could say things you knew triggered me, of course I'm going to leave! I'm having to go through my pregnancy without my partner, without the man I loved and still do! I still fucking love you, Ryan, despite what has happened," Andy said, tears in his eyes. I felt my breath catch in my throat. What had I done?

"I did love you, Andy. I always have. I always will. You don't understand how guilty I feel! I was such an idiot to say those things to you, just because I struggled to direct my anger to something necessary.

I need you, Andy. Our baby needs both of us. You need me. God, you look so beautiful," I smiled. Andy didn't say anything. "Please, just forgive me."

"Andy?" The boy asked, placing a hand on Andy's shoulder. I glared at him and he took his hand back off.

"I'm okay, Jon," Andy nodded, looking up at me. "I hate you."

Had I heard that right? Andy had said he hated me?

"A-Andy, angel, you don't mean that..." I said, tears in my own eyes.

"No, I don't. Because I have it bad for you, Ryan, and I love you with all I am, and will give you everything I have. Because you are my husband and I will love you endlessly."

"Rye, what the hell is taking so long?" Brook asked, walking up beside me. I heard him gasp when he saw Andy. "Andy?!"

The blonde boy nodded, not making eye contact with either of us. I hadn't actually taken in his newly blonde hair.

"When did you get it dyed?" I asked quietly.

"2 weeks ago."

I looked down at his stomach, gently placing a hand on top. I felt a tiny little kick, a massive smile etching across my face.

"What is it?" I asked. The question was unbelievably painful; I hadn't been with Andy to find out the gender of our own baby.

"A girl. We're having a baby girl, Ryan."

I didn't question why he kept calling me Ryan, even though it hit hard.

"Can I...?" Brook asked Andy, who nodded. My brother placed his hand on Andy's stomach, his eyes lighting up. "Holy crap. I'm going to be an uncle."

"Andy, I'm so sorry for what I did, for what I said. You mean the world to me, and I'd give everything I am to be with you. I don't deserve your love. I don't deserve your kind and loving nature. Baby, please forgive me. Say you'll come back with us, please. I can't bear being without you any longer, mi amor," I said, cupping Andy's face. He looked into my eyes, looking like he was searching for something. I let out a shaky sigh.

"Of course. I will forgive you, Rye. But you have to understand it's going to take time for me to trust you again."

"Of course, babe."

"Why would you trust him, Andy? You don't remember that picture?" Jon said, looking at me angrily. I said nothing, staring him dead in the eye.

"Jon, I told you not to bring that up," Andy said to him, which made me smile triumphantly, even though I knew that the picture was nothing to smile about. "But Rye, you have to also accept I forgave Jon. He's been helping me with this all, so he's going to come back to the castle with us."

I nodded. "Can you cook?" I asked, and he nodded. "Okay, I guess you could work as our chef as well."

"What happened to Alex?" Andy asked.

"I fired him. He got annoying," I said, scoffing at the thought of the boy. I then pulled Andy aside. "Babe, are you sure we can trust him?"

Andy nodded. "He's being genuine, Rye."

There were no words that could explain how happy and relieved I felt; I had found my husband, he had forgiven me, and he still loves me. I didn't tell Andy this, however: I was kind of surprised when I realised Andy had kept our daughter. I assumed he wouldn't want a baby inside of him.

"Let's go home, doll," I smiled, taking Andy's face in my hands. Connecting our lips, I'd craved it so much. My stomach fluttered with joy and I pulled away, taking Andy's hand.

A/N This chapter was such a mess but hope you enjoyed it anyway xx