The Boy in the Jersey ✔️

19

Chapter 19

Josh pulls away from me and has a huge smile on his face.

"How about we go inside after I kick everyone out and watch a movie or something" he asks with a gleam in his eyes.

"You need to enjoy your party Josh."

A deep chuckle sounds from his lips as his grip on my waist tightens. He leans in close while pulling my body flush against his.

"I wanna enjoy it with you." He whispers, his face merely centimeters from mine.

I could feel his warm minty breath against my lips as he spoke. Tingles coursed through my body.

"I-okay" I stammer

A devilish smirk makes its way onto his face and his eyes light up. He kisses my cheek and grabs my hand before pulling me towards the house. Once inside the stench knocked me over again. It was horrid.

Josh keeps glancing back at me as he pulls me through the crowd and to the stairwell at the front of the house.

"First door on the left is the bathroom, and second door on the right is my bedroom. Wait in there for me and I'll be up shortly ok?"

I nod my head and Josh leans in a pecks my lips before turning and heading back towards the kitchen.

I head up the stairs, dodging cups and bodies scattered across the floor. I walk down the hall to the second door and push it open. His bedroom was not what I expected when I saw the rest of the house.

His walls were a deep blue color and he had a queen sized bed in the middle against the far wall. Football posters littered the walls and ceiling. To the left he had rows of bookcases and shelves filled with trophies, medals and awards. A giant aquarium filled with colorful fish and a bright neon light covered up the remaining space on that wall.On the right side was a big oak desk that had his laptop, a hamster cage, and the same picture of Kiana and his mom that he had in his car.

I slowly make my way to the desk and sit down in the chair before peeking into the hamster cage. The little brown hamster scurries from behind its house and up the tube along the side of the cage.

The thumping music had stopped and I heard a muffled voice shouting but I couldn't pick anything up that was being said.

My attention moves from the hamster to his desk, it was so organized and neat. His whole room was. The only thing out of place was his bed, but who really makes their bed anymore?

A piece of paper with delicate purple ink caught my attention. I look back at the door making sure it was still shut before grabbing the paper.

Josh,

I know you're struggling still and I don't blame you. I wish you hadn't made that decision all those years ago. I miss you dearly honey and I'm so sorry. I'm sorry I couldn't be there again this year. I'm sorry that I haven't tried harder to get you out of that godforsaken place. I am so sorry honey.

I know it probably doesn't make much of a difference but I want you to know that I love you dearly and I miss you terribly. Once a month just isn't enough time to talk to you Josh. I wish that there was more I can do for you.

I know I don't deserve it but I need to ask a favor of you. I need you to keep going strong. Don't give up honey. I know you can make it through. Kiana and I believe in you. Keep fighting for her Josh. She needs her brother.

Now that you're eighteen I'm hoping you'll decide to move out of that house. I hate the idea of you being there. But I'm so glad you found someone to help you through it Josh. I'm so happy that you finally gave yourself a chance at happiness. Don't let her go Josh. Don't ever let her go. Can you promise me?

I love you so much honey.

-Mom

Tears prick the corner of my eyes as I read and reread the note. It wasn't my business, but now I know a little better what Josh was going through. It sucked that his mom blamed herself. Or that she felt Josh hated her. He has spoken so highly of her to me, if anything he is the one that feels guilty about whatever hell he's living in.

The door softly clicks shut behind me causing me to jump. I quickly wipe my eyes and turn around. Josh was staring at me with a broken look in his eyes. He glances down at the paper in my hand and then back up to me.

"I'm I'm sorry." I rush out as I put the paper back and stand up from the chair.

I wipe my hands on my skirt and walk towards the bedroom door.

"I should probably go. I'm so sorry Josh. I didn't mean to snoop"

Guilt was eating away at me. I knew better and I still went against what I know.

My hand grips his door knob and I twist it. He's behind me in a flash pushing the door shut.

"You don't have to leave Kelly" he whispers.

I turn around slowly and face him, he doesn't step back like I thought he would. We stand chest to chest as he looks down at me. His hands slowly make their way to my wrists and he drags them up my arms tantalizingly slow. My body tingled at his touch and a heat formed in my stomach.

His hands inches higher and higher so slow it was such a tease. He cups my face in his hands and slowly brings his lips to mine. He kisses me long and deep before he pulls away and eat his forehead on mine again.

He shuts his eyes and takes a deep breath.

"She writes me every week. And every week it's the same thing, an apology for the way things are." He whispers.

"I don't know what to say to her. She blames herself, and I know it's not her fault. She got out while she still had the chance."

His voice cracks as he speaks to me. I hated him being so broken. I knew what it felt like and I didn't want someone as kind and good as him to suffer.

I circle my hands around his waist and pull him into a hug. His arms go around my neck and he buries his face into my hair.

I didn't know what to say to him. I wanted to comfort him but I didn't know how.

"Kelly?" He mumbles pulling away slightly.

I look into his eyes and see all the pain. I wanted to make it go away.

"Can you stay with me tonight? I-I don't want to be alone."

I wanted to stay but I knew I couldn't. Logan would kill me and mom and dad would be worried about me if I didn't go home tonight.

But Josh needed me. I could see it in his eyes. He needed me.

"Of course I will"